St. Ives: Being the Adventures of a French Prisoner in EnglandStevenson, Robert Louis
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St. Ives: Being the Adventures of a French Prisoner in England
Stevenson, Robert Louis
French -- England -- Fiction; Prisoners of war -- Fiction
I was now driven back upon the Assembly Ball. Robbie had failed me. The
bank was watched; it would never do to risk Rowley in that neighbourhood.
All I could do was to wait until the morrow evening, and present myself
at the Assembly, let it end as it might. But I must say I came to this
decision with a good deal of genuine fright; and here I came for the
first time to one of those places where my courage stuck. I do not mean
that my courage boggled and made a bit of a bother over it, as it did
over the escape from the Castle; I mean, stuck, like a stopped watch or a
dead man. Certainly I would go to the ball; certainly I must see this
morning about my clothes. That was all decided. But the most of the
shops were on the other side of the valley, in the Old Town; and it was
now my strange discovery that I was physically unable to cross the North
Bridge! It was as though a precipice had stood between us, or the deep
sea had intervened. Nearer to the Castle my legs refused to bear me.
I told myself this was mere superstition; I made wagers with myself—and
gained them; I went down on the esplanade of Princes Street, walked and
stood there, alone and conspicuous, looking across the garden at the old
grey bastions of the fortress, where all these troubles had begun. I
cocked my hat, set my hand on my hip, and swaggered on the pavement,
confronting detection. And I found I could do all this with a sense of
exhilaration that was not unpleasing, and with a certain _crânerie_ of
manner that raised me in my own esteem. And yet there was one thing I
could not bring my mind to face up to, or my limbs to execute; and that
was to cross the valley into the Old Town. It seemed to me I must be
arrested immediately if I had done so; I must go straight into the
twilight of a prison cell, and pass straight thence to the gross and
final embraces of the nightcap and the halter. And yet it was from no
reasoned fear of the consequences that I could not go. I was unable. My
horse baulked, and there was an end!
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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