Entered then Foxy, with official port, and leaned something like a
cloth rolled round a stick against the desk. No one in authority was yet
present, so the school applauded, crying: “What’s that, Foxy? What are
you stealin’ the gentleman’s brolly for?--We don’t birch here. We cane!
Take away that bauble!--Number off from the right”--and so forth, till
the entry of the Head and the masters ended all demonstrations.
“One good job--the Common-room hate this as much as we do. Watch King
wrigglin’ to get out of the draft.”
“Where’s the Raymondiferous Martin? Punctuality, my beloved ’earers, is
the image o’ war--”
“Shut up. Here’s the giddy Dook. Golly, what a dewlap!” Mr. Martin,
in evening dress, was undeniably throaty--a tall, generously designed,
pink-and-white man. Still, Beetle need not have been coarse.
“Look at his back while he’s talkin’ to the Head. Vile bad form to turn
your back on the audience! He’s a Philistine--a Bopper--a Jebusite--an’
a Hivite.” McTurk leaned back and sniffed contemptuously.
In a few colorless words, the Head introduced the speaker and sat
down amid applause. When Mr. Martin took the applause to himself, they
naturally applauded more than ever. It was some time before he could
begin. He had no knowledge of the school--its tradition or heritage. He
did not know that the last census showed that eighty per cent. of the
boys had been born abroad--in camp, cantonment, or upon the high seas;
or that seventy-five per cent. were sons of officers in one or other of
the services--Willoughbys, Paulets, De Castros, Maynes, Randalls, after
their kind--looking to follow their fathers’ profession. The Head might
have told him this, and much more; but, after an hour-long dinner in his
company, the Head decided to say nothing whatever. Mr. Raymond Martin
seemed to know so much already.
He plunged into his speech with a long-drawn, rasping “Well, boys,”
that, though they were not conscious of it, set every young nerve ajar.
He supposed they knew--hey?--what he had come down for? It was not often
that he had an opportunity to talk to boys. He supposed that boys were
very much the same kind of persons--some people thought them rather
funny persons--as they had been in his youth.
“This man,” said McTurk, with conviction, “is _the_ Gadarene Swine.”
But they must remember that they would not always be boys. They would
grow up into men, because the boys of to-day made the men of to-morrow,
and upon the men of to-morrow the fair fame of their glorious native
land depended.
“If this goes on, my beloved ’earers, it will be my painful duty to rot
this bargee.” Stalky drew a long breath through his nose.
“Can’t do that,” said McTurk. “He ain’t chargin’ anything for his
Romeo.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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