For a year or so after their marriage it had been the custom that, the
first thing after breakfast on Monday morning, she should bring him
her account-book, that they might together go over her week's
expenses. She must cultivate the business habits in which, he said, he
found her more than deficient. How could he endure in a wife what
would have been preposterous in a clerk, and would have led to his
immediate dismissal? It was in his eyes necessary that the same strict
record of receipt and expenditure should be kept in the household as
in the office; how else was one to know in what direction things were
going? he said. He required of his wife, therefore, that every
individual thing that cost money, even to what she spent upon her own
person, should be entered in her book. She had no money of her own,
neither did he allow her any special sum for her private needs; but he
made her a tolerably liberal weekly allowance, from which she had to
pay everything except house-rent and taxes, an arrangement which I
cannot believe a good one, as it will inevitably lead some
conscientious wives to self-denial severer than necessary, and on the
other hand will tempt the vulgar nature to make a purse for herself by
mean savings off everybody else. It was especially distasteful to Mrs.
Dempster to have to set down every little article of personal
requirement that she bought. It would probably have seemed to her but
a trifle had they both been young when they married, and had there
been that tenderness of love between them which so soon sets
everything more than right; but as it was, she could never get over
the feeling that the man was strange to her. As it was she would have
got over this. But there was in her a certain constitutional lack of
precision, combined with a want of energy and a weakness of will, that
rendered her more than careless where her liking was not interested.
Hence, while she would have been horrified at playing a wrong note or
singing out of tune, she not only had no anxiety, for the thing's own
sake, to have her accounts correct, but shrunk from every effort in
that direction. Now I can perfectly understand her recoil from the
whole affair, with her added dislike to the smallness of the thing
required of her; but seeing she did begin with doing it after a
fashion, it is not so easy to understand why, doing it, she should not
make a consolation of doing it with absolute exactness. Not even her
dread of her husband's dissatisfaction--which was by no means
small--could prevail to make her, instead of still trusting a memory
that constantly played her false, put down a thing at once, nor
postpone it to a far less convenient season. Hence it came that her
accounts, though never much out, never balanced; and the weekly audit,
while it grew more and more irksome to the one, grew more and more
unsatisfactory to the other. For to Mr. Dempster's dusty eyes
exactitude wore the robe of rectitude, and before long, precisely and
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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