Studies in the Psychology of Sex, Volume 2: Sexual InversionEllis, Havelock
Science
Studies in the Psychology of Sex, Volume 2: Sexual Inversion
Ellis, Havelock
Sex; Sex (Psychology)
lad of 17 and 18, there was never any idea in our minds of any
sexual act. We are still warm friends, and always kiss when we
meet. Looking back upon those days, I feel that I was a little
inclined to pass on from one love to another, but each was a
genuine devotion, and involved real hard work on the lad's
behalf. And I know that where the lad stuck to me into manhood a
real tenderness and love remain still.
"While teaching I made the acquaintance of a non-conformist
minister, who, though happily married, had certainly some
homogenic tendencies. He was most devoted to boys and helped me
with regard to some difficult cases. It was the difficult cases
that always attracted me. I had to punish these lads and my
friend recommended spanking with the hand on the bare buttocks. I
mention that I adopted this method, because it might have been
thought specially dangerous to me. It certainly never produced in
me the remotest suggestion of any sexual act, though it did
sometimes produce a slight amount of sexual excitement. I
disregarded this, or put it out of my mind, as I found the method
most efficacious. It was capable of great variation of intensity,
and the boys were always ready to joke about it. I never came
across a case where any sexual excitement was produced by it. The
boys whom I had to be most 'down' on almost always, however, grew
fonder of me. There may be a slight and normal masochistic
tendency in most boys, and _perhaps_ the erogenic character of
the buttocks has something to do with the development of
affection. If so, I am inclined to regard it as normal and useful
rather than otherwise, for in my experience no undesirable result
was ever produced. But then, of course, there was no playing with
the business; that might, I am sure, in some cases be decidedly
injurious.
"One experience of my schoolmastering days is, I think, important
in its bearing upon general sexual psychology. I always noticed
that during the term I was specially free from 'wet dreams.' What
is noteworthy is this: During term there was never anything more
than a very partial sexual expression of any feeling of mine,
such expression indeed as was wholly inevitable. There was
therefore no actual loss of semen, and it seems clear that the
'wet dreams' were not due to mere physical pressure. The psychic
satisfaction of love in this case made the complete physical
expression less urgent. But it was a love of a distinctly tender
kind that was needed to keep the physical from obtruding. Of that
further experience has made me sure. I am, moreover, now
convinced that a _mutual_ uranian love will reach its best
results, both spiritual and physical, where there is complete
sexual expression.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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