Studies in the Psychology of Sex, Volume 3: Analysis of the Sexual Impulse; Love and Pain; The Sexual Impulse in WomenEllis, Havelock
Science
Studies in the Psychology of Sex, Volume 3: Analysis of the Sexual Impulse; Love and Pain; The Sexual Impulse in Women
Ellis, Havelock
Sex; Sex (Psychology)
least possible pain. In fact, my idea was to produce the maximum
of emotion with the minimum of actual discomfort.
"You must not, however, suppose that at the time I reasoned about
it at all in this way. I was very fond of her, and honestly
believed I was doing it for her good. Had I realized then, as I
do now, that my sole aim and object was physical pleasure, I
believe my pleasure would have ceased; in any case I should not
have felt justified in so treating her. Do I at all persuade you
that my pleasure was a reflection of hers? That it was, I think,
is clear from the fact that I only obtained it when she was
willing to submit. Any _real_ resistance or signs that I was
overpassing the boundary of pleasure in her and urging on pain
without excitement caused me to desist and my own pleasure to
cease.
"I disclaim all altruism in my dealings with my sister. What
occurs appears to me to be this: A situation appeals to one in
imagination and one at once desires to transfer it to the realms
of fact, being one's self one of the principal actors. If it is
the passive side which appeals to one, one would prefer to be
passive; but if that is not obtainable then one takes the active
part as next best. In either case, however, it is _the
realization of the imagined situation_ that gives the pleasure,
not the other person's pleasure as such, although his or her
supposed pleasure creates the situation. If I were a man it would
afford me great delight to hold a woman over a precipice, even if
she disliked it. The idea appeals to me so strongly that I could
not help _imagining_ her pleasure, though I might _know_ she got
none, and even though she made every demonstration of fear and
dislike of it. The situation so often imagined would have become
a fact. It seems to me I have to say a thing is and is not in the
same breath, but the confusion is only in the words.
"Let me give you another example: I have a tame pigeon which has
a great affection for me. It sits on my shoulder and squats down
with its wings out as birds do when courting, pecking me to make
me take notice of it, and flickering its wings. I like to hold it
so that it can't move its wings, because I imagine this increases
its excitement. If it struggles, or seems to dislike my holding
it, I let it go.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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