Studies in the Psychology of Sex, Volume 3: Analysis of the Sexual Impulse; Love and Pain; The Sexual Impulse in WomenEllis, Havelock
Science
Studies in the Psychology of Sex, Volume 3: Analysis of the Sexual Impulse; Love and Pain; The Sexual Impulse in Women
Ellis, Havelock
Sex; Sex (Psychology)
"5. The fact that many women satisfy their husbands when
themselves disinclined. This is like eating jam when one does not
fancy it, and has a similar effect. It is a great mistake, in my
opinion, to do so, except very rarely. A man, though perhaps
cross at the time, prefers, I believe, to gratify himself a few
times, when the woman also enjoys it, to many times when she does
not.
"6. The masochistic tendency of women, or their desire for
subjection to the man they love. I believe no point in the whole
question is more misunderstood than this. Nearly every man
imagines that to secure a woman's love and respect he must give
her her own way in small things, and compel her obedience in
great ones. Every man who desires success with a woman should
exactly reverse that theory."
When we are faced by these various and often conflicting statements of
opinion it seems necessary to obtain, if possible, a definite basis of
objective fact. It would be fairly obvious in any case, and it becomes
unquestionable in view of the statements I have brought together, that the
best-informed and most sagacious clinical observers, when giving an
opinion on a very difficult and elusive subject which they have not
studied with any attention and method, are liable to make unguarded
assertions; sometimes, also, they become the victims of ethical or
pseudoethical prejudices, so as to be most easily influenced by that class
of cases which happens to fit in best with their prepossessions.[164] In
order to reach any conclusions on a reasonable basis it is necessary to
take a series of unselected individuals and to ascertain carefully the
condition of the sexual impulse in each.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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