Studies in the Psychology of Sex, Volume 3: Analysis of the Sexual Impulse; Love and Pain; The Sexual Impulse in WomenEllis, Havelock
Science
Studies in the Psychology of Sex, Volume 3: Analysis of the Sexual Impulse; Love and Pain; The Sexual Impulse in Women
Ellis, Havelock
Sex; Sex (Psychology)
"I may summarize my own feelings thus: First, exciting ideas
alone produce, as a rule, merely the first stage of sexual
excitement. Second, the same ideas connected with a particular
person will produce the second stage. Third, the same may be said
of the presence of the beloved person. Fourth, actual contact
appears necessary for the third stage. If the first stage only be
reached, the sensation is not pleasurable in reality, or would
not be but for its association. If produced, as I have sometimes
found it to be, by a sense of mental incapacity, it is distinctly
disagreeable, especially if one feels that the energy which might
have been used in coping with the difficulty is being thus
dissipated. If it be produced, as it may be, as the result of
physical or mental restraint, it is also unpleasant unless the
restraint were put upon one by a person one loves. Then, however,
the second stage would probably be reached, but this would depend
a good deal on one's mood. If the first stage only were reached,
I think it would be disagreeable; it would mean a conflict
between one's will and sexual feeling. Perhaps women who feel
actual repugnance to the sexual act with a man they love have
never gone beyond the first stage, when their dislike to it would
be quite intelligible to me.
"Some time after the life in Italy had come to an end I became
engaged. There was considerable difficulty in the way of
marriage, but we saw a good deal of each other. My _fiancé_ often
dined with us, and we met every day. The result of seeing him so
frequently was that I was kept in a constant state of strong, but
suppressed, sexual excitement. This was particularly the case
when we met in the evening and wandered about the moonlit garden
together. When this had gone on about three months I began to
experience a sense of discomfort after each of his visits. The
abdomen seemed to swell with a feeling of fullness and
congestion; but, though these sensations were closely connected
with the physical excitement, they were not sufficiently painful
to cause me any alarm or make me endeavor to avoid their
pleasurable cause. The symptoms got worse, however, and no longer
passed off quickly as at first. The swelling increased;
considerable pain and a dragged-down sensation resulted the
moment I tried to walk even a short distance. I was troubled
with constant indigestion, weight in the chest, pain in the head
and eyes, and continual slight diarrhea. This went on for about
nine months, and then my _fiancé_ was called away from the
neighborhood. After his departure I got a trifle better, but the
symptoms remained, though in less acute form. A few months later
the engagement was broken off, and for some weeks I was severely
ill with influenza and was on my back for several weeks. When I
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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