"Oh, no; no!" She answered the harsh thought subtending his query. "Not
for myself. Not for any pride. I'm not cheap, Ban."
"No; you're not cheap."
"I would have kept my distance.... It was quite true what I said to you
about Betty Raleigh. It was not success alone that I wanted for you; I
wanted happiness, too. I owed you that--after my mistake."
He caught up the last word. "You've admitted to yourself, then, that it
was a mistake?"
"I played the game," she retorted. "One can't always play right. But one
can always play fair."
"Yes; I know your creed of sportsmanship. There are worse religions."
"Do you think I played fair with you, Ban? After that night on the
river?"
He was mute.
"Do you know why I didn't kiss you good-bye in the station? Not really
kiss you, I mean, as I did on the island?"
"No."
"Because, if I had, I should never have had the strength to go away."
She lifted her eyes to his. Her voice fell to a half whisper. "You
understood, on the island?... What I meant?"
"Yes."
"But you didn't take me. I wonder. Ban, if it hadn't been for the light
flashing in our eyes and giving us hope...?"
"How can I tell? I was dazed with the amazement and the glory of it--of
you. But--yes. My God, yes! And then? Afterward?"
"Could there have been any afterward?" she questioned dreamily. "Would
we not just have waited for the river to sweep us up and carry us away?
What other ending could there have been, so fitting?"
"Anyway," he said with a sudden savage jealousy, "whatever happened you
would not have gone away to marry Eyre."
"Should I not? I'm by no means sure. You don't understand much of me, my
poor Ban."
"How could you!" he burst out. "Would that have been--"
"Oh, I should have told him, of course. I'd have said, 'Del, there's
been another man, a lover.' One could say those things to him."
"Would he have married you?"
"You wouldn't, would you?" she smiled. "All or nothing, Ban, for you.
About Del, I don't know." She shrugged dainty shoulders. "I shouldn't
have much cared."
"And would you have come back to me, Io?"
"Do you want me to say 'Yes'? You do want me to say' Yes,' don't you, my
dear? How can I tell?... Sooner or later, I suppose. Fate. The
irresistible current. I am here now."
"Io." He leaned to her across the little table, his somber regard
holding hers. "Why did you tell Camilla Van Arsdale that you would never
divorce Eyre?"
"Because it's true."
"But why tell her? So that it should come back to me?"
She answered him straight and fearlessly. "Yes. I thought it would be
easier for you to hear from her."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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