French fiction -- 20th century -- Translations into English
"Annette!" he besought her. "Annette! Don't run away! I don't want to
pursue you. See, I'm staying here, I shan't come near you. I've behaved
like a brute. I'm ashamed, ashamed. Call me any names you like, but
don't run away. I shall never touch you again, not even with the tip of
my finger. I'm disgusted with myself. I ask your pardon on my knees!"
He knelt down awkwardly on the pebbles. He looked utterly wretched. He
was ridiculous.
Annette, who was listening to him in cold silence, motionless, with her
face turned away, threw him a side-glance without looking at him. She
saw this humiliated man. She was touched by his humiliation; her warm
heart had the faculty of opening to the emotions of others as if they
were her own, and she blushed at Leopold's shame. She made a movement
towards him and said, "Get up!"
He rose, and she instinctively recoiled a few steps. "You are still
afraid," he said. "You will never forgive me."
"Don't speak of it any more," she answered dryly. "It's ended."
They descended the road again. Annette was dumb and frozen. He had
difficulty in keeping silent. He was mortified, and he was trying to
justify himself. But he was not very eloquent, the poor man. His style
was not exactly noble. "I am a dirty cur!" he repeated angrily.
Annette, still agitated, repressed a smile. Her mind was in a tumult,
and she found difficulty in calming it. She felt at the same time the
loathsomeness and the absurdity of the scene. She had not forgiven him,
and she was ready to pity the man who was accusing himself so
pathetically beside her. He continued to flounder. She listened to him
with bitterness, compassion, irony. He struggled to explain "this filthy
madness that passes through your body." . . . Yes, this madness, she
knew it, although it was not the time to tell him so. But he looked so
wretched that, in spite of herself, she said to him, "I know. One is mad
sometimes. What's done is done."
They continued on their way, without speaking, their hearts heavy, sad
and embarrassed. Just as they were arriving at the spot where they had
left Sylvie, Annette made a gesture as if she were about to hold out her
hand to Leopold. But instead of doing so, she said, "I've forgotten it."
He was relieved, though he was still troubled. Like a schoolboy caught
in some misdemeanor, he asked, "You won't say anything about it?"
Annette gave him a little pitying smile.
No, she said nothing. But at the first glance the sharp eye of Sylvie
had seen it all. She asked no questions. They spoke of other things. And
while all three, to hide their thoughts, made a great parade of
chattering all the way home, Sylvie observed the two others.
From that day forward Annette and Leopold were never again alone
together. The jealous one was always watching; Annette too was on her
guard. In spite of herself she allowed her distrust to be viable. And
Leopold, who was hurt, brooded over his unconfessed bitterness.
XX
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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