Humorous stories; United States -- Social life and customs -- 20th century -- Fiction
"No, it wasn't all. There was something else that has set me all of a
flutter. If it wasn't as you never can tell whether a newspaper is
voracious or just bearing false witness, I'd certainly feel as if
Jathrop was playing fast and loose with my affections. I can remember,
and you can remember, too, when the freedom of the press didn't mean
freedom to make a Pike's Peak out of a ant hill. But in these days
there's no telling whether, when we read of a poor soul being attacked
by a wild beast, it's a jungle tiger or just a pet yellow kitten. Folks
would rather read about the tiger than the kitten, and so the papers
give 'em what they want without any regard for the real facts a _tall_.
Elijah Doxey, who's a real editor if there ever was one, and knows all
about the paper business, says that the newspaper, like everything else,
has to keep abreast of the times or go to the wall, and that since
people in these days 'ld rather read fiction than history, it stands to
reason a paper can't stand in its own light by sticking always to cold
commonplace facts."
"Did the--?" Mrs. Lathrop attempted mildly to question.
"I don't know, I d'n know, I'm sure, Mrs. Lathrop. But the interview
with Jathrop wasn't all interview, by no means. It said a lot about his
party, and it mentioned each of the millionaires as was in it. Seems the
interview was given on one of those Atlantic City board walks, and it
was given--from what on earth do you think, Mrs. Lathrop? From a wheel
chair. Jathrop in a wheel chair! Think of that! And not alone, either.
'Beside him,' wrote the interviewer, 'was the beautiful, dark-eyed Cuban
señora who, rumor says, is soon to become his bride.' My lands! If it
hadn't been for Mr. Kimball's apple barrel, I certainly would have
dropped. It would 'a' been bad enough if they was both strong and well,
but to think of Jathrop being too weak to walk and going to marry a
foreigner no more robust than himself. You can't imagine the shock it
give me. For a minute I was clean speechless, and I'd 'a' been dumb yet,
I do believe, if it wasn't as I begun to figure things out in my head
and got sight of a ray of hope. Just as like as not, I says, Jathrop was
suffering from the sudden change of climate,--from the Klondike to Cuba
seems to me a pretty rigorous switch for any constitution,--and the
Cuban woman was more'n likely his trained nurse fetched from the island.
Either that or the woman was just recovering from a illness, and Jathrop
got in to ride with her out of pure kindness of heart. Then, too, I
remembered that: 'rumor says,' and cheered right up. Rumor never told
the truth yet, as far as I know, and it's not in reason to believe the
shameless thing is going to reform in these degenerate days. Jathrop may
be going to marry the señora, I don't say he isn't, and I don't say he
is. But before I believe it, I've got to have some better authority than
what rumor says. He's steered clear of wives in the Klondike, and he's
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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