This remark was cast loose upon Society, as a sort of general challenge; and, as such, it was at once accepted by several of those within hearing: _Money_ became the key-note of the conversation for some time; and a fitful echo of it was again heard, when the dessert had been placed upon the table, the servants had left the room, and the Earl had started the wine in its welcome progress round the table. “I’m very glad to see you keep up the old customs,” I said to Lady Muriel as I filled her glass. “It’s really delightful to experience, once more, the peaceful feeling that comes over one when the waiters have left the room—when one can converse without the feeling of being overheard, and without having dishes constantly thrust over one’s shoulder. How much more sociable it is to be able to pour out the wine for the ladies, and to hand the dishes to those who wish for them!” “In that case, kindly send those peaches down here,” said a fat red-faced man, who was seated beyond our pompous friend. “I’ve been wishing for them—diagonally—for some time!” “Yes, it _is_ a ghastly innovation,” Lady Muriel replied, “letting the waiters carry round the wine at dessert. For one thing, they _always_ take it the wrong way round—which of course brings bad luck to _everybody_ present!” “Better go the _wrong_ way than not go _at all_!” said our host. “Would you kindly help yourself?” (This was to the fat red-faced man.) “You are not a teetotaler, I think?” “Indeed but I _am_!” he replied, as he pushed on the bottles. “Nearly twice as much money is spent in England on _Drink_, as on any other article of food. Read this card.” (What faddist ever goes about without a pocketful of the appropriate literature?) “The stripes of different colours represent the amounts spent on various articles of food. Look at the highest three. Money spent on butter and on cheese, thirty-five millions: on bread, seventy millions: on _intoxicating liquors_, one hundred and thirty-six millions! If I had my way, I would close every public-house in the land! Look at that card, and read the motto. _That’s where all the money goes to!_” “Have you seen the _Anti-Teetotal Card_?” Arthur innocently enquired. “No, Sir, I have not!” the orator savagely replied. “What is it like?” “Almost exactly like this one. The coloured stripes are the same. Only, instead of the words ‘Money spent on,’ it has ‘Incomes derived from sale of’; and, instead of ‘That’s where all the money goes to,’ its motto is ‘_That’s where all the money comes from!_’” The red-faced man scowled, but evidently considered Arthur beneath his notice. So Lady Muriel took up the cudgels. “Do you hold the theory,” she enquired, “that people can preach teetotalism more effectually by being teetotalers themselves?”