Of the two hours which followed upon this it is unnecessary to give more
than a sketch. The Admiral was extremely silly, now and then amusing,
and never really offensive. It was plain that he kept in view the
presence of his daughter, and chose subjects and a character of language
that should not offend a lady. On almost any other occasion Dick would
have enjoyed the scene. Van Tromp’s egotism, flown with drink, struck a
pitch above mere vanity. He became candid and explanatory; sought to
take his auditors entirely into his confidence, and tell them his inmost
conviction about himself. Between his self-knowledge, which was
considerable, and his vanity, which was immense, he had created a strange
hybrid animal, and called it by his own name. How he would plume his
feathers over virtues which would have gladdened the heart of Cæsar or
St. Paul; and anon, complete his own portrait with one of those touches
of pitiless realism which the satirist so often seeks in vain.
‘Now, there’s Dick,’ he said, ‘he’s shrewd; he saw through me the first
time we met, and told me so—told me so to my face, which I had the virtue
to keep. I bear you no malice for it, Dick; you were right; I am a
humbug.’
You may fancy how Esther quailed at this new feature of the meeting
between her two idols.
And then, again, in a parenthesis:—
‘That,’ said Van Tromp, ‘was when I had to paint those dirty daubs of
mine.’
And a little further on, laughingly said perhaps, but yet with an air of
truth:—
‘I never had the slightest hesitation in sponging upon any human
creature.’
Thereupon Dick got up.
‘I think perhaps,’ he said, ‘we had better all be thinking of going to
bed.’ And he smiled with a feeble and deprecatory smile.
‘Not at all,’ cried the Admiral, ‘I know a trick worth two of that. Puss
here,’ indicating his daughter, ‘shall go to bed; and you and I will keep
it up till all’s blue.’
Thereupon Esther arose in sullen glory. She had sat and listened for two
mortal hours while her idol defiled himself and sneered away his godhead.
One by one, her illusions had departed. And now he wished to order her
to bed in her own house! now he called her Puss! now, even as he uttered
the words, toppling on his chair, he broke the stem of his tobacco-pipe
in three! Never did the sheep turn upon her shearer with a more
commanding front. Her voice was calm, her enunciation a little slow, but
perfectly distinct, and she stood before him as she spoke, in the
simplest and most maidenly attitude.
‘No,’ she said, ‘Mr. Naseby will have the goodness to go home at once,
and you will go to bed.’
The broken fragments of pipe fell from the Admiral’s fingers; he seemed
by his countenance to have lived too long in a world unworthy of him; but
it is an odd circumstance, he attempted no reply, and sat thunderstruck,
with open mouth.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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