_Irishman_.--“Most willingly.” _Scotchman_.--“Then I shall owe my victory to our friend Dr. Johnson, the leviathan of English literature. In his celebrated preface to Shakspeare he says, that ‘he has not only shown human nature as it acts in real exigencies, but as it _would be found in situations to which it cannot be exposed_.’ These are his own words; I think I remember them accurately.” The English gentleman smiled, and our Hibernian acknowledged that the Scotchman had fairly gained the victory. “My friends,” added he, “as I cannot pretend to be ‘convinced against my will,’ I certainly am not ‘of the same opinion still.’ But stay--there are such things as practical bulls: did you never hear of the Irishman who ordered a painter to draw his picture, and to represent him standing behind a tree?” _Englishman_.--“No: but I have heard the very same story told of an Englishman. The dealers in _good jokes_ give them first to one nation and then to another, first to one celebrated character and then to another, as it suits the demand and fashion of the day: just as our printsellers, with a few touches, change the portrait of General Washington into the head of the king of France, and a capital print of Sir Joshua Reynolds into a striking likeness of _the Monster_. “But I can give you an instance of a practical bull that is not only indisputably English, but was made by one of the greatest men that England ever produced, Sir Isaac Newton, who, after he had made a large hole in his study-door for his cat to creep through, made a small hole beside it for the kitten. You will acknowledge, sir, that this is a good practical bull.” “Pardon me,” said the Hibernian, “we have still some miles further to go, and, if you will give me leave, I will relate ‘an Hibernian tale,’ which exemplifies some of the opinions held in this conversation.” The Scotch and English gentlemen begged to hear the story, and he began in the following manner. CHAPTER XIV. THE IRISH INCOGNITO.