My mind being now perfectly satisfied of the truth of Ellinor’s story,
I was next to consider how I ought to act. To be or not to be Lord
Glenthorn, or, in other words, to be or not to be a villain, was now the
question. I could not dissemble to my conscience this plain state of the
case, that I had no right to keep possession of that which I knew to be
another’s lawful property; yet, educated as I had been, and accustomed
to the long enjoyment of those luxuries, which become necessaries to the
wealthy; habituated to attendance as I had been; and, even amongst the
dissipated and idle, notorious for extravagance the most unbounded and
indolence the most inveterate; how was I at once to change my habits, to
abdicate my rank and power, to encounter the evils of poverty? I was
not compelled to make such sacrifices; for though Ellinor’s transient
passion had prompted her to threaten me with a public discovery, yet I
knew that she would as soon cut off her own right hand as execute her
threats. Her affection for me, and her pride in my consequence, were so
strong, that I knew I might securely rely upon her secrecy. The horrid
idea of being the cause of the death of one of her own children had for
a moment sufficient power to balance her love for me; yet there was but
little probability that any similar trial should occur, nor had I reason
to apprehend that the reproaches of her conscience should induce her to
make a voluntary discovery; for all her ideas of virtue depended on the
principle of fidelity to the objects of her affection, and no
scrupulous notions of justice disturbed her understanding or alarmed her
self-complacency. Conscious that she would willingly sacrifice all she
had in the world for any body she loved, and scarcely comprehending that
any one could be selfish, she, in a confused way, applied the maxim of
“Do as you would be done by,” and was as generous of the property of
others as of her own. At the worst, if a law-suit commenced against
me, I knew that possession was nine points of the law. I also knew that
Ellinor’s health was declining, and that the secret would die with her.
Unlawful possession of the wealth I enjoyed could not, however, satisfy
my own mind; and, after a severe conflict between my love of ease and my
sense of right--between my tastes and my principles--I determined to
act honestly and honourably, and to relinquish what I could no longer
maintain without committing injustice, and feeling remorse. I was,
perhaps, the more ready to do rightly because I felt that I was not
compelled to it. The moment when I made this virtuous decision was the
happiest I had at that time ever felt: my mind seemed suddenly relieved
from an oppressive weight; my whole frame glowed with new life; and
the consciousness of courageous integrity elevated me so much in my own
opinion, that titles, and rank, and fortune, appeared as nothing in my
estimation. I rang my bell eagerly, and ordered that Christy O’Donoghoe
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