When a man feels that his fondness for a wife is suspended, he is uneasy
in her company, not only from the sense of decreased pleasure, but from
the fear of her observation and detection. If she reproach him, affairs
become worse; he blames himself, he fears to give pain whenever he is in
her presence: if he attempt to conceal his feelings, and to appear what
he is no longer, a lover, his attempts are awkward; he becomes more and
more dissatisfied with himself; and the person who compels him to this
hypocrisy, who thus degrades him in his own eyes, must certainly be in
danger of becoming an object of aversion. A wife, who has sense enough
to abstain from all reproaches, direct or indirect, by word or look, may
reclaim her husband’s affections: the bird escapes from his cage, but
returns to his nest. I am glad that you have agreeable company at your
house; they will amuse Mr. L----, and relieve you from the necessity of
taking a share in any conversation that you dislike. Our witty friend
----will supply your share of conversation; and as to your silence,
remember that witty people are always content with those who _act
audience_.
I rejoice that you persist in your daily occupations. To a mind like
yours, the sense of performing your duty will, next to religion, be the
firmest support upon which you can rely.
Perhaps, my dear, even when you read this, you will still be inclined to
justify Lady Olivia, and to conceal from your heart the suspicions
which her conduct excites. I am not surprised, that you should find it
difficult to believe, that one to whom you have behaved so generously,
should treat you with treachery, and ingratitude. I am not surprised,
that you who feel what it is to love, should think, that a woman whose
heart is occupied by attachment to one object, must be incapable of
thinking of any other. But love in such a heart as yours is totally
different from what it is in the fancy of these heroines. In their
imagination, the objects are as fleeting as the pictures in the clouds
chased by the wind.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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