Tales and Novels — Volume 10: HelenEdgeworth, Maria
General
Tales and Novels — Volume 10: Helen
Edgeworth, Maria
England -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction; Women -- England -- Fiction
Between each half sentence he darted looks at her, defying hers to
contradict--and she could not contradict by word or look. “You could not
speak,” continued he passionately, “till you had well determined
what was to be told--what left untold to me! To me, Helen, your
confiding--devoted--accepted lover! for I protest before Heaven, had
I knelt at the altar with you, Helen Stanley, not more yours, not
more mine could I have deemed you--not more secure of your love and
truth--your truth, for what is love without it!--not more secure of
perfect felicity could I have been on earth than I was when we two sat
together but yesterday evening on that bank. Your words--your looks--and
still your looks--But what signify tears!--Tears, women’s tears! Oh!
what is woman!--and what is man that believes in her?--weaker still?”
“Hear me!--hear me!”
“Hear you?--No, Helen, do not now ask me to hear you.--Do not force
me to hear you.--Do not debase, do not sully, that perfect image of
truth.--Do not sink yourself, Helen, from that height at which it was
my entranced felicity to see you. Leave me one blessed, one sacred
illusion. No,” cried he, with increasing vehemence, “say nothing of all
you have prepared--not one arranged word conned over in your midnight
and your morning consultations,” pointing back to the window of her
dressing-room, where he had seen her and Lady Cecilia.
“You saw,” Helen began----
“Yes.--Am I blind, think you?--I wish I were. Oh! that I could be again
the believing, fond, happy dupe I was but yesterday evening!”
“Dupe!” repeated Helen. “But pour out all--all, dear Granville.
Think--say--what you will--reproach--abuse me as you please. It is a
relief--take it--for I have none to give.”
“None!” cried he, his tone suddenly changing, “no relief to give!--What!
have you nothing to say?--No explanation?--Why speak to me then at all?”
“To tell you so at once--to end your suspense--to tell you that I cannot
explain. The midnight consultation and the morning, were not to prepare
for you excuse or apology, but to decide whether I could tell you the
whole; and since that cannot be, I determined not to enter into any
explanation. I am glad that you do not wish to hear any.”
“Answer me one question,” said he:--“that picture-did you give it to
Colonel D’Aubigny?”
“No. That is a question I can answer. No--he stole it from Cecilia’s
portfolio. Ask me no more.”
“One question more--”
“No, not one more--I cannot tell you anything more.”
She was silent for a moment, he withdrew his eyes, and she went on.
“Granville! I must now put your love and esteem for me to the test. If
that love be what I believe it to be; if your confidence in me is what I
think it ought to be, I am now going to try it. There is a mystery which
I cannot explain. I tell you this, and yet I expect you to believe
that I am innocent of anything wrong but the concealment. There are
circumstances which I cannot tell you.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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