"Ah, poor Wolstang," observed another: "he ran deranged some weeks ago,
and has been going about asking for himself ever since."
"I assure you I am not dead," said I, throwing myself upon my knees
before my cousin, who was present.
"I know that, my good fellow," was his answer, "but poor Stadt, you see,
is gone for ever."
"That is not Stadt--it is I--it is I--will you not believe me! I am
Stadt--this is not me--I am not myself. For heaven's sake suspend this
funeral." Such were my exclamations, but they produced no other effect
but that of pity among the bystanders.
"Poor unfortunate fellow, he is crazed. Get a porter, and let him be
taken home."
This order, which was given by my cousin himself, stung me to madness,
and, changing my piteous tones for those of fierce resistance, I swore
that "I would not turn out for any man living. I would not be buried
alive to please them." To this nobody made any reply, but in the course
of a minute four stout porters made their appearance, and I was forced
from the house.
Returning to Wolstang's lodgings, the old man was there in waiting, as
he promised. "What," said I with trepidation,--"what is the scheme you
were to propose? Tell me, and avert the horrible doom which will await
me, for they have refused to suspend the funeral."
"My dear friend," said he in the most soothing manner, "your case is far
from being so bad as you apprehend. You have just to write your name in
this book, and you will be yourself again in an instant. Instead of
coming alive in the grave, you will be alive before the coffin-lid is
put on. Only think of the difference of the two situations."
"A confounded difference indeed," thought I, taking hold of the pen. But
at the very moment when I was going to write, I observed above the
following words:--
"I hereby engage, after my natural decease, to give over my
soul to the owner of this book."
"What!" said I, "this is the old compact; the one you wished me to sign
before?"
"The same, my dear friend."
"Then I'll be d----d if I sign it."
"Only think of the consequences," said he.
"I will abide the consequences rather than sell my soul."
"Buried alive, my dear sir--only think."
"I will not sign the compact."
"Only think of being buried alive," continued he,--"stifled to
death--pent up on all sides--earth above, earth below--no hope--no room
to move in--suffocated, stupified, horror-struck--utter despair. Is not
the idea dreadful? Only think what your feelings will be, when you come
to life in that narrow charnel-house, and know your situation."
I gave a shudder at this picture, which was drawn with horrible truth;
but the energies of religion, and the hopes of futurity, rushed upon my
soul, and sustained it in the dreadful trial. "Away, away," said I,
pushing him back. "I have made up my mind to the sacrifice, since better
may not be. Whatever happens to my body, I am resolved not to risk my
eternal soul for its sake."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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