"I'll do naething o' the kind," replied the urchin, walloping his bare
legs, by way of encouragement, against the sides of the anatomy he
bestrode. "The sands is just as free to huz as to ony o' ye, and I would
like to ken what richt ye have tae prevent the foulks frae bathin'."
"Do you dare to resist, you vagabond?" cried the man of stripes, with a
terrific flourish of his sabre. "Wheel back immediately, or"----and he
went through the first four cuts of the sword exercise.
"Eh man!" said the intrepid shrimp, "what wull ye do? Are ye no ashamed,
a great muckle fellie like you, to come majoring, an' shakin' yer swurd
at a bit laddie? Eh, man, if I was ner yer size, I'd gie ye a licking
mysel'. Stand oot o' the gate, I say, an' I'll sune run through the
haill o' ye. I'm no gaun to lose a saxpence for yeer nonsensical
parauds."
"Cancel my commission!" said the lieutenant, "if the brat hasn't
bothered the sergeant! The bathing-machine is coming down upon us like
the chariot of Queen Boadicea! This will never do. Randolph--you and
M'Whirter ride out and reinforce. That scoundrel is another Kellerman,
and will break us to a dead certainty!"
"Twa mair o' ye!" observed the youth with incredible nonchalance, as we
rode up with ferocious gestures. "O men, but ye're bauld bauld the day!
Little chance the Frenchies wad hae wi' the like o' you 'gin they were
comin'! Gee hup, Bauldy!"
"Come, come, my boy," said Randolph, nearly choking with laughter, "this
is all very well, but you must positively be off. Come, tumble round, my
fine fellow, and you shall have leave to pass presently."
"Aum no gaun to lose the tide that way," persevered the urchin. "The
sands is open to the haill o' huz, and I'll no gang back for nane o' ye.
Gin ye offer tae strike me, I'll hae the haill squad o' ye afore the
Provost o' Portobelly, and, ma certie, there'll be a wheen heels sune
coolin' in the jougs!"
"By heavens! this is absolutely intolerable!" said the
sergeant--"M'Whirter, order the man in the inside to open the door, and
come out in Her Majesty's name."
I obeyed, as a matter of course.
"I say--you, sir, inside--do you know where you are going? Right into
the centre of a troop of the Royal Yeomanry Cavalry! If you are a
gentleman and a loyal subject, you will open the door immediately, and
desire the vehicle to be stopped."
In order to give due effect to this remonstrance, and also to impress
the inmate with a proper sense of the consequences of interference with
martial discipline, I bestowed cut No. Seven with all my might upon the
machine. To my horror, and that of my companions, there arose from
within a prolonged and double-voiced squall.
"Hang me, if it isn't women!" said the sergeant.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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