As ill luck would have it, my poetical temperament began to
ferment within me, and to work out new troubles. The inflammatory
air of a great metropolis added to the rural scenes in which the
fairs were held; such as Greenwich Park; Epping Forest; and the
lovely valley of the West End, had a powerful effect upon me.
While in Greenwich Park I was witness to the old holiday games of
running down hill; and kissing in the ring; and then the
firmament of blooming faces and blue eyes that would be turned
towards me as I was playing antics on the stage; all these set my
young blood, and my poetical vein, in full flow. In short, I
played my character to the life, and became desperately enamored
of Columbine. She was a trim, well-made, tempting girl, with a
rougish, dimpling face, and fine chestnut hair clustering all
about it. The moment I got fairly smitten, there was an end to
all playing. I was such a creature of fancy and feeling that I
could not put on a pretended, when I was powerfully affected by a
real emotion. I could not sport with a fiction that came so near
to the fact. I became too natural in my acting to succeed. And
then, what a situation for a lover! I was a mere stripling, and
she played with my passion; for girls soon grow more adroit and
knowing in these than your awkward youngsters. What agonies had I
to suffer. Every time that she danced in front of the booth and
made such liberal displays of her charms, I was in torment. To
complete my misery, I had a real rival in Harlequin; an active,
vigorous, knowing varlet of six-and-twenty. What had a raw,
inexperienced youngster like me to hope from such a competition?
I had still, however, some advantages in my favor. In spite of my
change of life, I retained that indescribable something which
always distinguishes the gentleman; that something which dwells
in a man’s air and deportment, and not in his clothes; and which
it is as difficult for a gentleman to put off as for a vulgar
fellow to put on. The company generally felt it, and used to call
me little gentleman Jack. The girl felt it too; and in spite of
her predilection for my powerful rival, she liked to flirt with
me. This only aggravated my troubles, by increasing my passion,
and awakening the jealousy of her parti-colored lover.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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