Tales of a Vanishing RiverReed, Earl H. (Earl Howell)
History
Tales of a Vanishing River
Reed, Earl H. (Earl Howell)
Illinois -- Social life and customs -- Fiction; Kankakee River (Ind. and Ill.) -- Fiction; Short stories, American
With this she favored me with a stealthy sidelong glance and I was
thereupon proposed for membership by Rat Hyatt, who added that I seemed
to be the “only outsider present from a distance that hadn’t
hornswoggled the club durin’ the past hour.”
Sophy’s talon-like fingers closed quickly on the two-dollar bill that I
handed her as the first year’s dues, after my election and the formal
adjournment of the meeting.
While I was entirely out of sympathy with the turkey shoots, I was glad
for several reasons to become a member.
After most of the crowd had dispersed I was solemnly conducted into the
church and informed that, in order to become a full-fledged member,
certain things must be imparted to me to complete my initiation. I was
then told that all “Turkeys” knew each other by certain grips and
cabalistic words. The “grip” consisted of shaking hands with three
fingers only, representing the three front toes of a turkey. The
“countersign” was “Pop-Pop!” signifying rifle firing at the annual
shoot. The countersign, loudly uttered, with three fingers held aloft,
constituted “the grand high sign,” and I was told that I must always
relieve any brother Turkey who hungered or thirsted, and made such a
sign. With my promise to remember all this, the ceremony, which my
instructors, Bill and Rat, considered very humorous, was ended.
The Reverend Butters had been a sorrowful spectator of the proceedings
of the afternoon, but his furrowed face brightened when Josh Varney
gracefully presented him with one of the big dripping birds that he was
carrying to his buggy. In prayer before his congregation on the
following Sunday he expressed humble gratitude with the words, “Out of
the iniquities of the world, O Lord, has sustenance come to the body of
thy servant, and beneath a cloak of sin have Thy blessings been
transmitted unto Thine anointed one.”
The relations between the old preacher and Rat Hyatt had been slightly
embarrassing since Rat’s conversion and sudden backsliding of the year
before, and they had little to say to each other when they met. Rat was
now regarded as a hopeless loss and a minute part of hell’s future fuel
supply. He considered his former spiritual comforter “a busted wind
bag,” so there seemed little left to say on either side.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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