Pilniak, Boris, 1894-1937 -- Translations into English; Soviet Union -- Social life and customs -- Fiction
Lydia Constantinovna smiled as she answered: "Why not indeed! That is
a poetic fancy. But the reality is very much worse. Marin-Brod has
never been a country house, it is a forest manor, a forestry-office
and nothing more ... nothing more.... I always feel an interloper
here. This is only my second day and I am already depressed." Her
tone was sad, yet it held just a perceptible note of anger.
"Reality and Fancy? Certainly I am an artist, for I always see the
latter, the beautiful and spiritual side," Mintz declared; and added
in an undertone: "Do you remember yesterday ... the park?"
"Oh, yes, the park," Lydia replied in a tired, subdued tone. "They
hold the Twelfth Gospel Service to-day; when I was a young girl, how
I used to love standing in church with a candle--I felt so good. And
now I love nothing!"
It was already quite dark in the drawing room. A wavering, greenish-
golden light streamed in through the windows and played on the dim
walls. Ivanov came out of his study. He was wearing high boots and a
leather jacket, and carried a rifle under his arm. He went silently
to the door. Lydia Constantinovna stopped him.
"Are you going out again, Sergius? Is it to hunt?"
"Yes."
Ivanov stood still and Lydia went up to him. She had dark shadows
under her eyes, and the hand of time--already bearing away her youth
and beauty--lay upon her marvellously white skin, at her lips and on
her cheeks, in faint, scarcely visible wrinkles. Ivanov noticed it
distinctly.
"Does one hunt at night--in the dark? I did not know that," Lydia
said, repeating "I did not know...."
"I am going to the wood."
"I have come back here after not having seen you for months, and we
have not yet spoken a word...."
Ivanov did not reply, but went out. His footsteps echoed through the
great house, finally dying away in the distance. The front-door
slammed, shaking the whole mansion, which was old and falling to
pieces.
Lydia Constantinovna remained in the middle of the room, her face
turned to the door. Mintz approached, took her hand, and raised it to
his lips.
"You must not take it to heart, Lit," he said softly and kindly.
She freed her hand and laid it on Mintz's shoulder.
"No, one should not take it to heart," she assented in a low voice,
"One should not.... But listen, Mintz.... How strange it all is! Once
he loved me very much, though I never loved him.... But my youth was
spent here, and now I feel unhappy.... I remember all that happened
in this drawing-room, it was the first time. If only I could have all
over again! Perhaps I should act differently then. I feel sorry now
for my youth and inexperience, though formerly I cursed them, and I
am far from regretting all that followed afterwards. But I need a
refuge now.... If you only knew how much he loved me in those
days!..."
Lydia Constantinovna was silent a moment, her head bent, then
flinging it back she gave a hollow sardonic laugh.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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