“Ach, lasse! lass mich doch! Get on with your cooking!” she exclaimed as
Bertha began her customary sociable and playful greeting. Bertha always
was conscious of her noise, of shallowness and worldliness, with this
shrewd, indifferent, slow, and monosyllabic bookworm. She wanted to caper
round it, inviting it to cumbrous play, like a small lively dog around a
heavy one. She was much more _femme_ as she said, but aware that Clara
did not regard this as an attainment. Being _femme_ had taken up so much
of her energy and life that she could not expect to be so complete in
other ways as Clara. With this other woman, who was much less “woman”
than she, she always felt impelled to ultra-feminine behaviour. She was
childish to the top of her bent. This was insulting to the other: it
showed too clearly Bertha’s way of regarding her as not so much _femme_
as herself. Clara felt this and would occasionally show impatience at
Bertha’s skittishness: a gruff man-like impatience entering grimly but
imperturbably into the man-part, but claiming at the same time its
prerogatives.
Clara had had no known love affairs. She regarded Bertha, sometimes, with
much curiosity. This “woman’s temperament,” so complacently displayed,
soothed and tickled her.
“Clara, Soler has told me to send a picture to the Salon d’Automne.”
“Oh!” Clara was not impressed by “success.” She was preparing her own
breakfast and jostled Bertha, usurping more than half the table. Bertha,
delighted, retorted with trills of shrill indignation and by recapturing
the positions lost by her plates. Her breakfast ready she carried it into
her room, pretending to be offended with Clara.
Breakfast over she wrote to Tarr. The letter was written quite easily and
directly. She was so sure in the convention of her passion that there was
no scratching out or hesitation. “I feel so far away from you.” There was
nothing more to be said; as it had been said often before, it came easily
and promptly with the pen. All the feeling that could find expression was
fluent, large and assured, like the handwriting, and went at once into
these conventional forms.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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