Kreisler had lately been spoken about uncharitably among them. By
inevitable analogy he had, in her mind, been pushed into the same boat
with Tarr. She always _felt_ herself a little _without_ the circle.
So, Bertha, still in this unusual way clinging to him (although she had
ceased plying him with conversation) they proceeded along the solitary
backwater of Boulevard in which they were. Pipes lay all along the edge
of excavations to their left, large flaccid surface-machinery of the
City. They tramped on under the small uniform trees Paris is planted
with, a tame and insipid obsession.
Kreisler ignored his surroundings. He was transporting himself,
self-guarded Siberian exile, from one cheerless place to another.
To Bertha Nature still had the usual florid note. The immediate
impression caused by the moonlight was implicated with a thousand former
impressions: she did not discriminate. It was the moon illumination
of several love affairs. Kreisler, more restless, renovated his
susceptibility every three years or so. The moonlight for him was
hardly nine months old, and belonged to Paris, where there was no
romance. For Bertha the darkened trees rustled with the delicious and
tragic suggestions of the passing of time and lapse of life. The black
unlighted windows of the tall houses held within, for her, breathless
and passionate forms, engulfed in intense eternities of darkness
and whispers. Or a lighted one, in its contrast to the bland light
of the moon, so near, suggested something infinitely distant. There
was something fatal in the rapid never-stopping succession of their
footsteps—loud, deliberate, continual noise.
Her strange companion’s dreamy roughness, this romantic enigma of the
evening, suddenly captured her fancy. The machine and indiscriminate side
of her awoke.
She took his hand—rapid, soft and humble, she struck the deep German
chord, vibrating rudimentarily in the midst of his cynicism.
“You are suffering! I know you are suffering. I wish I could do something
for you. Cannot I?”
Kreisler began tickling the palm of her hand slightly. When he saw it
interrupted her words, he stopped, holding her hand solemnly as though
it had been a fish slipped there for some unknown reason. Having her
hand—her often-trenchant hand with its favourite gesture of sentimental
over-emphasis—captive, made her discourse almost quiet.
“I know you have been wronged and wounded. Treat me as a sister: let me
help you. You think my behaviour odd: do you think I’m a funny girl? But,
ah! we walk about and torment each other enough! I knew you were not
drunk, but were half-cracked with something—Perhaps you had better not
come on to this place⸺”
He quickened his steps, and still gazing stolidly ahead, drew her by the
hand.
“I only should like you to feel I am your friend,” she said.
“Right!” with promptness came through his practical moustache.
“You’re afraid I—” she looked at the ground, he ahead.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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