“No,” he said, “but you shall know my secret! Why should not I avail
myself of your sympathy? You must know that my _frac_—useful to waiters,
that is why I get so much for the poor suit—this _frac_ is at present
_not_ in my lodgings. No. That seems puzzling to you? Have you ever
noticed an imposing edifice in the Rue de Rennes, with a foot-soldier
perpetually on guard? Well, he mounts guard, night and day, over my
suit!” Kreisler pulled his moustache with his free hand—“Why keep you
in suspense? My _frac_ is not on my back because—it is _in pawn_!
Now, Fräulein, that you are acquainted with the cause of my slight,
rather wistful, _meditative_ appearance, you will be able to sympathize
adequately with me!”
She was crying a little, engrossed directly, now, in herself.
He thought he should console her.
“Those are the first tears ever shed over my _frac_. But do not distress
yourself, Fräulein Lunken. The _garçons_ have not yet got it!”
Kreisler did not distinguish Bertha much from the others. At the
beginning he was distrustful in a mechanical way at her advances. If
not “put up” to doing this, she at least hailed from a quarter that
was conspicuous for Teutonic solidarity. Now he accepted her present
genuineness, but ill-temperedly substituted complete boredom for
mistrust, and at the same time would use this little episode to embellish
his programme.
He had not been able to shake her off: it was astonishing how she had
stuck: and here she still was; he was not even sure yet that he had the
best of it. His animosity for her friends vented itself on her. He would
anyhow give her what she deserved for her disagreeable persistence. He
shook her hand again. Then suddenly he stopped, put his arm round her
waist, and drew her forcibly against him. She succumbed to the instinct
to “give up,” and even sententiously “destroy.” She remembered her
resolve—a double one of sacrifice—and pressed her lips, shaking and
wettened, to his. This was not the way she had wished: but, God! what did
it matter? _It mattered so little, anything_, and above all _she_! This
was what she had wanted to do, and now she had done it!
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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