United States -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction
By this time the gentlemen had alighted, and Mr. Middleton went forward to
receive them. "How d’ye do, how d’ye do?" said he; "I’m mighty glad you’ve
come. I wish you’d brought the whole city."
"We came pretty near it, I think," said Mr. Miller, at the same time
presenting Mr. Stafford and Mr. Cameron.
Mr. Middleton continued talking, as if replying to Mr. Miller’s first
remark. "No consequence, no consequence, Mr. Stafford, Mr. Cameron, how
are you? The more the merrier. I s’pose they’ve told you all about Josh,
so I needn’t make b’lieve any—but come in—the house looks better inside
than it does out." "Ho, Luce," continued he, "where the old boy is your
mistress? Tell her thar’s heaps of folks here, and mind tell Aunt Judy to
get us up a whalin’ dinner."
Here he stopped to take breath for a moment, and then proceeded. "You must
excuse my rig, gentlemen, or rather, you must excuse what ain’t rigged;
mebby if I’d known all you city buggers was comin’, I’d a kivered my bar
feet."
"You go barefoot for comfort?" said Mr. Miller.
"Why, yes, mainly for that, I suppose," answered Mr. Middleton, "for I’ve
got such fetchin’ big corns on my feet that I ain’t goin’ to be cramped
with none of your toggery. My feet happen to be clean, for I washed them
in the watering trough this mornin’. How d’ye leave my gals?"
"They are well," answered Mr. Miller, "or rather Julia is, and Fanny is
improving every day."
"I’ve often wondered," said Mr. Middleton, "what ’twas ailded Sunshine
when she was sick. She didn’t seem to have no disease in particular, and I
reckon nothin’s on her mind, for all’s straight between her and Dr. Lacey,
as far as I know."
"Dr. Lacey!" repeated Frank, without knowing what he said.
"Yes, Dr. Lacey; know him?" asked Mr. Middleton.
"No, sir," answered Frank, and Ashton rejoined, "I imagine he wishes Fanny
had never known him."
Mr. Middleton turned, and for a moment regarded Frank intently. Frank
stood the inspection manfully, and Mr. Middleton said, "You are from New
York, hey? I like New Yorkers, and if Sunshine wasn’t promised to Dr.
Lacey and never had seen him, and I liked you, I’d as soon you’d have her
as anybody."
Mr. Stafford now said that he was acquainted with Dr. Lacey, and proceeded
to speak of the pleasant time he had spent with him. This occupied the
time until dinner was ready.
"Come, haul up," said Mr. Middleton, "haul up; we didn’t expect so many to
dinner, but the old table’ll stretch and you must set clus; but don’t none
of you step on my corns, for thunder’s sake!"
Frank thought if his host kept on talking he should not be able to eat for
laughing, but the old man was but just getting into the merits of the
case!
When his guests were seated, he said to Mr. Stafford, "Your white neck
cloth looks like you might belong to the clergy. If you do, you can say a
short prayer over the eggs and bacon, but Lord’s sake be spry, for I’m
blarsted hungry!"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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