"Say, Lord strike me dead, if you don't!"
I said so and he took me down. I faltered a good night, and he turned to
go, walking as if he were numb and stiff. When I saw him turn to look once
more at me, I made the best use of my legs, having a terrible fear of him,
and of the young man, and I ran home without once stopping.
I found the forge shut up and Joe alone in the kitchen. The minute I
raised the latch, he said:
"Mrs. Joe has been out a dozen times looking for you, Pip, and she's out
now, and what's more, she's got Tickler with her."
At this dismal intelligence I looked with great depression at the fire.
Tickler was a wax-ended piece of cane, worn smooth by contact with my
tickled frame.
"She sot down," said Joe, "and she got up, and she made a grab at Tickler,
and she rampaged out. Now she's a-coming! Go behind the door, old chap!"
I took the advice, but my sister, throwing the door wide open, and finding
an obstruction behind it, guessed the cause, and applied Tickler to its
further investigation.
"Where have you been, you young monkey?" she asked, stamping her foot;
"Tell me directly what you've been doing to wear me away with fret and
fright and worrit?"
"I have only been in the church-yard," said I, crying and rubbing myself,
but my answer did not satisfy my sister, who kept on scolding and applying
Tickler to my person until she was obliged to see to the tea things.
Though I was very hungry, I dared not eat my bread and butter, for I felt
that I must have something in reserve to take my dreadful acquaintance in
case I could find nothing else. Therefore, at a moment when no one was
looking, I put a hunk of bread and butter down the leg of my trousers. Joe
thought I had eaten it in one gulp, which greatly distressed him, and I
was borne off and dosed with tar water.
Conscience is a dreadful thing when it accuses man or boy. The guilty
knowledge that I was going to rob Mrs. Joe, united to the necessity of
keeping one hand on my bread and butter as I sat or moved about, almost
drove me out of my mind, but as it was Christmas Eve, I was obliged to
stir the pudding for next day for one whole hour. I tried to do it with
the load on my leg, and found the tendency of exercise was to bring the
bread out at my ankle, so I managed to slip away and deposit it in my
garret room. Later there was a sound of firing in the distance. "Ah," said
Joe, "there's another convict off!"
"What does that mean, Joe," said I.
Mrs. Joe answered, "Escaped, escaped," and Joe added,--"There was one off
last night, and they fired warning of him. And now it appears they're
firing warning of another."
"Who's firing?" said I.
"Drat that boy," said my sister, frowning. "What a questioner he is! Ask
no questions and you'll be told no lies!"
I waited a while, and then as a last resort, I said,--"Mrs. Joe, I should
like to know--if you wouldn't much mind--where the firing comes from?"
"Lord bless the boy!" she exclaimed, "from the Hulks!"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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