Ten Years Among the Mail Bags: Or, Notes from the Diary of a Special Agent of the Post-Office DepartmentHolbrook, James
History
Ten Years Among the Mail Bags: Or, Notes from the Diary of a Special Agent of the Post-Office Department
Holbrook, James
Postal service -- United States
In opposition to the sentimental Valentines, we have the gross
caricatures which have done more than anything else of this kind to
disgust the common sense and good taste of community. It would seem
that only the most vulgar minds could be attracted by these; yet the
large traffic in them shows that vulgarity is an extensive element in
the popular character. No matter how indelicate and disgusting one of
these specimens of low invention may be, some fool will be found to
purchase it, and send it to another individual whom he either wishes
to insult or expects to amuse.
In this way all sorts of printed immoralities obtain circulation. In
this way cowards take revenge for imaginary slights or dignified
rejections. In this way, for about two or three weeks in each year,
some altogether harmless and well-meaning people have been subjected
to gross annoyances and serious taxes for postage. Thanks to the
law-makers, the advance pay requisition will hereafter put a stop to
that species of petty swindling.
Year after year the same foolish figures and senseless mottos are
forwarded from the same simpletons to the same victims. We know a
musician who for three successive seasons has received that witched
caricature, representing a shape--
"If shape it could be called that shape had none,--"
all nose and moustache, blowing a trombone considerably larger than
himself.
Our dentist usually enjoys a visit from a caricature suited to _his_
profession--a tooth-drawer with his little head in a vast chasm
representing a young lady's mouth. He has learned to expect it; he
good-naturedly looks for it, about Valentine's day; and merely opening
it when it comes, to see that it is the right one, he quietly tosses
it into the fire.
This Valentine sending is a custom like that of a certain drunken
revel once popular in Denmark,--"More honored in the breach than in
the observance." It is ignored by good society. And as for the
victimized, it is a mark of common sense to bestow every Valentine
into the grate, unopened, as soon as received.
It is estimated that not less than half a million of these worse than
worthless missives pass through the post-offices annually. The cost to
the parties purchasing them, forms an aggregate of about $200,000.
Over and above this expense is the postage, which is sometimes double,
triple, or even four or five times the ordinary rates of single
letter postage. Formerly many were unpaid, and often persons to whom
they were addressed, indignantly refused to take them from the office.
Thus were the mails not only uselessly encumbered with the vile trash,
but quantities of the "rejected addresses" were subjected to the
formality of visiting the Dead Letter Office, where they finally met
with that destruction they so clearly merited. This abuse of the
post-office privileges is unworthy of any nation above the capacity of
monkeys.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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