Then came lunch, and the sort of lunch that Taplow, alone of all the
hotel-keepers I know, can serve at short notice. During the meal the
talk was all of tennis and walking and the beauties of the locality and
nothing in particular--not a word about anything more important. But
afterwards June made an obvious excuse to leave me alone with him, and
then, at my suggestion, we went out into the sunlit lane. "Let's climb
to the Punch-Bowl," Terry said, and I agreed, as I would have agreed to
anything.
That afternoon! It was a time of almost sheer happiness, for I took
thought of nothing but the clear truth that somehow or other the miracle
had been accomplished. He was _keen_ again, filled with the old zest for
life and work; and he told me, embarrassedly at first, but with
eagerness after a while, the things that were in his mind.
First of all he thanked me for the way I had managed to put up with him.
That was rather an unnerving experience. Then he expressed his gratitude
to Severn, and said that he would visit him soon and thank him
personally. "To think," he exclaimed, "that all these months he's been
ill, and I haven't even visited him!"
"He'll certainly be glad to see you," I said, and rather oddly, perhaps,
I didn't think of Helen.
"I want to repay him," he went on. "And also--I must have a job. Do you
think he could help me again?"
"What sort of a job?" I asked, and he replied confidently: "There's only
one sort of a job I'll ever have, whether I starve or not. And that's
the job I've been successful in already."
It was fine to hear him talk like that; and yet, when I thought of
Karelsky, it was infuriating. _Successful_? He really thought he _had_
been. He said: "I _must_ work. I feel there's work that only I can do.
That's conceit, I daresay, but I can't help it. I feel I must get on
with the job. I'd go back to Vienna if there were nowhere else."
Before I could check myself I had exclaimed: "Indeed you won't do
_that_!" and he looked up with such sharp surprise that I knew then, as
June had known earlier, the utter impossibility of telling him the
truth. She had said that I should agree with her, but it wasn't exactly
that. I knew he must find out the truth in time; but I felt that _I_
couldn't tell him--not just then, at any rate. I even, in a sort of way,
joined in the deception; I felt that for the present he must be helped
and not hindered in his dream. I told him I was sure that Severn would
manage to find him the sort of post he wanted, and that probably it
would be a good deal nearer home than Vienna.
"I don't care where it is," he answered. "Anywhere will suit
me--provided the work's there." And he added, with particular intensity:
"Thank God I'm not married, or anything like that.... As it is, I'm
free--absolutely--to give my whole life to the sort of things I
want...."
VI
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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