"'The gale has been awfull. The Portuguese is not out yet, nor like to be. They are not like my Nelson, but fine-weather sailors that must be protected by a port, and a fort if there is any enemy near. And you have all the anxiety, which I know you detest, of waiting for others to move, as the good Emperor must, when he hears of the sacrifice we have been making to send so fine an army, from which, by this, I believe, the French will be in full flight. I know how your head will be splitting from the wound you got in the service of your country in your glorious victory; and Emma would like to be with you, laying her hands, which you say are so smooth and full of vittality, on the poor wounded forehead and also on the topp of your head, when the blood is throbbing there. It gives her such joy to think that you like her to be with you, even when you are too ill to raise your head; she can be quiet, indeed she can, and wait until her presence can save you the slightest effort which would make fresh pains in your head. But what pleases me most is that when the badd pains is gone and you suffer from a nervousness that they should return, Emma is able, with scarce observed kisses and gentle wiles, to draw you out of yourself, so that you forgett you are playing hide and seek with the head-ache. I have what is worse, the heart-ache. There is no cure for that but time. You know how I was sick for Greville, that I had lived with as his wife, in the first months that I was at Napoli with dear Sir William. Often have I thought that I was dying of a broken heart; only hearts don't break, dear Nelson, though you believe that they do, if I may say Nay to so great a man. Every night I wept myself to sleep when I slept at all, and if it had not been for Sir William's goodness--he was like a father to a dying child, and cheated me out of the death for which I so longed by humouring me. I tell you I was a good wife to Greville, Nelson, though I was never married to him as I have been to Sir William. I had not another earthly thought except to be with him and be his slave to do his slightest wish. Had he beaten me I would have stayed to be beaten, not even trying to escape the blows. I think even they would have been dear to me, because he had given them to me. I was but a girl, and loved a man to be master of me.