The Adventures of Ferdinand Count Fathom — CompleteSmollett, T. (Tobias)
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The Adventures of Ferdinand Count Fathom — Complete
Smollett, T. (Tobias)
Adventure stories; Gothic fiction
None of these observations escaped the penetrating eye of Fathom, who,
before he pretended to seat himself in this machine, had made proper
inquiry into all the other methods practised, with a view to keep the
wheels in motion. In his researches, he found that the great world was
wholly engrossed by a few practitioners who had arrived at the summit
of reputation, consequently were no longer obliged to cultivate those
arts by which they rose; and that the rest of the business was
parcelled out into small enclosures, occupied by different groups of
personages, male and female, who stood in rings, and tossed the ball
from one to another, there being in each department two sets, the
individuals of which relieved one another occasionally. Every knot was
composed of a waiting-woman, nurse, apothecary, surgeon, and physician,
and sometimes a midwife was admitted into the party; and in this manner
the farce was commonly performed.
A fine lady, fatigued with idleness, complains of the vapours, is
deprived of her rest, though not so sick as to have recourse to
medicine. Her favourite maid, tired with giving her attendance in the
night, thinks proper, for the benefit of her own repose, to complain of
a violent headache, and recommends to her mistress a nurse of approved
tenderness and discretion; at whose house, in all likelihood, the said
chambermaid hath oft given the rendezvous to a male friend. The nurse,
well skilled in the mysteries of her occupation, persuades the patient,
that her malady, far from being slight or chimerical, may proceed to a
very dangerous degree of the hysterical affection, unless it be nipt in
the bud by some very effectual remedy. Then she recounts a surprising
cure performed by a certain apothecary, and appeals to the testimony of
the waiting-woman, who being the gossip of his wife, confirms the
evidence, and corroborates the proposal. The apothecary being summoned,
finds her ladyship in such a delicate situation, that he declines
prescribing, and advises her to send for a physician without delay. The
nomination of course falls to him, and the doctor being called,
declares the necessity of immediate venesection, which is accordingly
performed by a surgeon of the association.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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