said Charles Larkyns to our hero, who had been listening to the conversation with some wonderment, - understanding about as much of it as many persons who attend the St. James's Theatre understand the dialogue of the French Plays. "There are College ~cabalia~, as well as Jewish; and College surnames are among these. 'The King of Oude' was a man of the name of Towlinson, who always used to carry into Hall with him a bottle of the '~King of Oude's Sauce~,' for which he had some mysterious liking, and without which he professed himself unable to get through his dinner. At one time he was a great friend of Cocky Palmer's, and used to go with him to the cock-fights at Wheatley - that village just on the other side Shotover Hill - where we did a 'constitutional' the other day. Cocky, as our respected friend says, 'Came to grief,' but was allowed to save himself from expulsion by voluntarily, or rather in-voluntarily, taking his name off the books. When his connection with Cocky had thus been ruthlessly broken, 'the King' got into a better set, and retrieved his character." "The moral of which, my beloved Giglamps," observed Mr. Bouncer, "is, that there are as many sets of men in a College as there are of quadrilles in a ball-room, and that it's just as easy to take your place in one as it is in another; but, that when you've once taken up your position, you'll find it ain't an easy thing, you see, to make a change for yourself, till the set is broken up. Whereby, Giglamps, you may comprehend what a grateful bird you ought to be, for Charley's having put you into the best set in Brazenface." Mr. Verdant Green was heard to murmur, "sensible of honour, - grateful for kindness, - endeavours to deserve," - and the other broken sentiments which are commonly made use of by gentlemen who get upon their legs to return thanks for having been "tea-potted." "If you like to hear it," said Mr. Bouncer, "I'll read you my letter to the Mum. It ain't very private; and I flatter myself, Giglamps, that it'll serve you as a model." "Let's have it by all means, Harry," said Charles Larkyns. "It must be an interesting document; and I am curious to hear what it is that you consider a model for epistolary communi- [AN OXFORD FRESHMAN 161] cation from an undergraduate to his maternal relative." "Off she goes then;" observed Mr. Bouncer; "lend me your ears - list, list, O list! as the recruiting-sergeant or some other feller says in the Play. 'Now, my little dears! look straight for'ard - blow your noses, and don't brathe on the glasses!'" and Mr. Bouncer read the letter, interspersing it with explanatory observations:-