The Adventures of My Cousin SmoothTempleton, Timothy
General
The Adventures of My Cousin Smooth
Templeton, Timothy
Pierce, Franklin, 1804-1869 -- Humor; United States -- Politics and government -- 1853-1857
"'A demand from the King!' announced Noggs, with ominous accent.
Suddenly a suspicious-looking gent, smothered in dark uniform bespread
with a profusion of lace, was ushered in, and with an elastic step,
and quick, wandering eye, approached gracefully the President (me) and
announced himself as King's Messenger. For a moment he stood
uncovered, as if taking a bird's-eye-view of the mental qualities of
America; then, raising his right hand, which held a scroll, he
extended it to the Chair as Mr. O'Sullivan demanded--'Hats off!' The
silence of a minute was then broken by Monsieur Souley, who, having
regained his courage, interposed sarcastically,--'a messenger from the
King of the Dutch?' The official gave a glance in return, and bowed. A
seat was now provided for the stranger, who, as he was about to sit
down, intimated that in the event of the terms of his Majesty's
proclamation not being complied with, painful as it would be to his
feelings, he would, in deference to his orders, be compelled to resort
to arms. It was a moment full of painful anxiety: the Chair cast an
eye over the document, as every one waited with eager suspense its
being read aloud. At length, summoning to my aid all the dignity my
composition entertained, I rose as each restless eye denoted hope and
anxiety, and said I would read the King's commands, which were to the
following effect:--'That whereas sundry evil-disposed persons, not
having the fear of God before their eyes, and representing themselves
as citizens of the American Republic, have come into this country with
ill intent, and have, in defiance of law and order, held sundry
meetings for the purpose of conspiring against the peace of the State
and safety of the throne; and whereas the said persons herein set
forth have, since their landing on our beloved soil, conducted
themselves in a manner so riotous as to cause suspicion of their
deliberations, be it known to all concerned in this mysterious
gathering, that by this my proclamation I forbid the holding of any
such assemblies; and further, that unless that now in deliberation be
at once dispersed, the persons found engaged in it will be dealt with
according to the law made and provided for the punishment of vagrants
in general. Signed and sealed with our hands, &c., &c.' Need I say
that the reading this proclamation created a wonderful sensation,
which was here and there interspersed with marks of contempt for its
authority. The Chair, I insinuated, would await any remarks. Mr.
Buckhanan immediately rose, and proposed that we bow to the authority,
and move to a more congenial atmosphere. Messrs. Souley, Belmont
(having come back), and Jackson, rose to oppose. The King's Messenger
also rose: seeing the first symptoms of a powerful opposition
manifesting itself, he would warn gentlemen of the Congress that it
was of no use--they must move on! By way of adding tone to his demand,
he intimated that it might be necessary to motion his guard. As things
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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