An Englishman, entering his home, does not walk in upon the [Pg103] /first floor/, but upon the /ground floor/. What he calls the /first floor/ (or, more commonly, /first storey/, not forgetting the penultimate /e/!) is what we call the /second floor/, and so on up to the roof--which is covered not with /tin/, but with /slate/, /tiles/ or /leads/. He does not /take/ a paper; he /takes in/ a paper. He does not ask his servant, "is there any /mail/ for me?" but, "are there any /letters/ for me?" for /mail/, in the American sense, is a word that he seldom uses, save in such compounds as /mail-van/ and /mail-train/. He always speaks of it as /the post/. The man who brings it is not a /letter-carrier/, but a /postman/. It is /posted/, not /mailed/, at a /pillar-box/, not at a /mail-box/. It never includes /postal-cards/, but only /post-cards/; never /money-orders/, but only /postal-orders/. The Englishman dictates his answers, not to a /typewriter/, but to a /typist/; a /typewriter/ is merely the machine. If he desires the recipient to call him by telephone he doesn't say, "/phone me/ at a quarter /of/ eight," but "/ring me up/ at a quarter /to/ eight." And when the call comes he says "/are you there?/" When he gets home, he doesn't find his wife waiting for him in the /parlor/ or /living-room/,[4] but in the /drawing-room/ or in her /sitting-room/, and the tale of domestic disaster that she has to tell does not concern the /hired-girl/ but the /slavey/ and the /scullery-maid/. He doesn't bring her a box of /candy/, but a box of /sweets/. He doesn't leave a /derby/ hat in the hall, but a /bowler/. His wife doesn't wear /shirtwaists/ but /blouses/. When she buys one she doesn't say "/charge it/" but "/put it down/." When she orders a /tailor-made suit/, she calls it a /coat-and-skirt/. When she wants a /spool of thread/ she asks for a /reel of cotton/. Such things are bought, not in the /department-stores/, but at the /stores/, which are substantially the same thing. In these stores /calico/ means a plain cotton cloth; in the United States it means a printed cotton cloth. Things bought on the instalment plan in England are said to be bought on the /hire-purchase/ plan or system; the instalment business itself is the /credit-trade/. Goods ordered by /post/ (not mail) on which the dealer pays the cost of transportation are said to be sent, not /postpaid/ or /prepaid/, but /post-free/ or /carriage-paid/. [Pg104]