Mate selection -- Fiction; United States -- Social life and customs -- 20th century -- Fiction
“Nice little Kit-boy,” Helen began, carelessly. “I want to tell you,
for your own sake, because I know you’re unsophisticated enough to
worry over it, that this afternoon I was trying out a wager I had
with myself. I won it, you’ll be pleased to hear; the real me! I was
straight about asking you to fix up a marriage with me. I truly think,
or rather I did think so then, that it would be a good, sensible,
rather all-around nice arrangement. I don’t think so now, Kit, my dear!
You were right and I wrong. I’m not your sort, and, please don’t mind
one last bit of frankness: I’d simply die of you as steady diet! I’m
like Becky Sharp: I don’t like bread and butter! But the rest of the
racket was--what do you boys call it, chucking a bluff?--was chucking
a bluff. I _thought_ your decency was the real thing, but it is a
foible of mine to study people, preferably on pins, like grubs. I don’t
mind what I do with you, so I put you on a pin, and mighty well did you
wriggle, true to the compass. Though I couldn’t be sure you wouldn’t
have kissed me if that nas--nice little girl hadn’t happened along!
I’m not really a vamp, you know, Kits! It was a mean trick for your
old chum to play on you, but you came out fine; a bit crude, not too
clever, but a mighty nice kid, just as you always were! So don’t let
any constraint creep in, Kit! It was a game and you won it--and so did
I! I wanted to get this said before you slept; it’s an error to allow
embarrassment to develop at breakfast; fearfully hard to get rid of it
in daylight! Shake hands, Kit. I won’t squeeze yours! Only please tell
me I did it well! I have every kind of vanity, but I’m especially vain
of my acting!”
Kit conquered his natural impulse to speak the truth, to set straight
anything distantly resembling a misstatement.
“You’ve got Bernhardt and them all beaten a mile, Helen,” he said.
“Upon my honour, till you told me, I thought it wasn’t acting! Well
as I’d known you, for so long, too, you fooled me! Go on the boards,
Helen; it was great! But a trifle exhausting. I’m sleepy. Aren’t you?
You’ve earned the right to rest. Good-night, Siddons-Rachel-Bernhardt!
Good-night, Helen of Troy, whose face lighted fires enough, and still
does!”
Kit left the room quickly. Helen went over to her mirror studying, yet
hardly consciously seeing her face, now hard and not beautiful.
“Well, at least I’ve helped him to act like a man! He accepted the lie
quite decently, played up better than I thought he would. It’s bye-bye,
Kit! He’s still to be coveted. If I were sentimental, I’d say I was in
love with him, but, since I’m not sentimental, I’ll say, instead, that
I’m going to marry St. George--also his dragon--and be ridiculously
rich and handsome and haughty.”
Helen turned off the light to undress in the dark; she did not like to
see herself in the mirror just then.
* * * * *
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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