The Arbiter: A NovelBell, Florence Eveleen Eleanore Olliffe, Lady
History
The Arbiter: A Novel
Bell, Florence Eveleen Eleanore Olliffe, Lady
Great Britain -- History -- Victoria, 1837-1901 -- Fiction; Spy stories
Sir William winced and writhed helplessly under Rendel's words. The
intolerable discomfort and misery that he felt as the moment of
discovery drew near had given place gradually to a furious resentment at
what he was being made to endure at the hands of one who ought not to
have presumed to criticise him. As Rendel stood there, his clearly cut
face hard and stern, pouring out accusations and reproach, Gore felt as
if the younger man embodied all the adverse influences of his own life.
It was through Rendel that the fatal opportunity had come of his getting
himself into this terrible strait, Rendel: who, most unjustly in the
scheme of things, was daring to tax Gore with it. It was too horrible to
bear longer. He too felt that the time had come when that with which his
heart and soul were overflowing must find vent in speech. As he heard
Rendel's words of stern impeachment ringing in his ears, "I tell you
frankly that I believe that you did this thing," he rose desperately to
his feet.
"Well," he said, casting with a kind of horrible relief all restraints
and prudence to the winds, "what if I had?"
Rendel turned pale.
"If you had?" he said. "You did it, then?"
"If I had," Gore went on quickly, "it wouldn't have been a crime. You
can't know how easy it was for the thing to happen. I am not going to
tell you--I am not going to justify myself----" And he went on with a
passionate need of self-vindication, drawing from his own words the
conviction that he had hardly been at fault.
"Sir William," Rendel said hurriedly, "tell me----"
"It is easy enough," said Gore, "for you to talk of faith and trust. You
need not grudge my child's faith in me. I have nothing else left now."
And as the two men looked at each other each in his soul had a vision of
the gracious presence that had always been by Sir William's side: of one
who would have believed in him, justified him, if the whole world had
accused him. Rendel suddenly paused as he was going to speak.
"Life is very easy for you," Gore went on in a rapid, trembling voice.
Oh, the relief of saying it all!
"It is all quite plain sailing for you, you with whom everything
succeeds, you who are young and have your life before you. You have time
for the things that happen to you to be made right."
"Don't let us discuss all that now," said Rendel, with an effort. "We
are talking of something else that matters more than I can say. You
only can tell me----"
"I will tell you nothing," said Gore loudly, excited and breathless,
speaking in gasps. "One day when you are old and alone--and both of
these things may come to you as well as to other people--you will
understand what all this means to me."
"Father, dear father!" cried Rachel, coming in hurriedly. Anxious and
wretched at Rendel's interview with her father being so unduly
prolonged, she had wandered upstairs again, and when she heard the
excited and angry voices she could bear the suspense no longer. "What is
it?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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