The Army Mule, and Other War SketchesCastle, Henry A. (Henry Anson)
History
The Army Mule, and Other War Sketches
Castle, Henry A. (Henry Anson)
United States -- History -- Civil War, 1861-1865; United States. Army -- Military life
An appalling phalanx of apparitions at times menaced the peace of
nervous taxpayers over prospective drafts on their plethoric
resources. A cat may kick at a king. Men gifted with wind and lungs,
men with well-shaved voice and neatly-modulated nose, have proclaimed
a shuddering dread of future difficulty in preparing for wholesale
care of the thriftless ex-soldier. But those unsophisticated suspects
went on ruthlessly, recklessly, paying their own full share of the
taxes and manifestly bent on relentlessly taking care of themselves.
The identical persons who in the honey-dew days of the "Boys in Blue"
had gaily floated in geysers of taffy, constantly sprayed with
cascades of gush, were, ten years later, the objects of fathomless
solicitude on the part of contemporaries who feared that universal
pauperism would engulf them. Vain was the dread; bootless the
solicitude. In the aggregate, the discharged Veterans contributed in
taxes more than the sum total of their army pay, and by their own
productive labor added more to the wealth of the nation than the
entire cost of the war. And at any time within the last thirty years
there might have been found in all our prisons a larger per capita
proportion of former church dignitaries and bank officers than of
honorably discharged soldiers of the Union. The typical Veteran was
neither a tramp nor a bummer. He was a thrifty, self-respecting,
patriotic citizen. At the plow, the anvil, the lathe; on the engine,
the mail car, the ship; in the lumbering camp, the harvest field, the
counting-room, the factory; at the bar, on the bench, in the
pulpit--everywhere in spheres of useful, successful effort, he wrought
faithfully, ardently, triumphantly.
Even where the Veterans never went, their influence penetrated and
vivified and fructified. Their aromatic, anaesthetic codfish, their
mackerel stuffed with savor and salinity, have carried freedom's
tidings to Borneo's wilds. A Grand Army post annually observes
memorial day in distant Honolulu. Ireland and Poland, lanced spots of
a huge European suppuration, have felt the pulsations of our victory.
And on the dim frontiers of far-off Argentina, sweet girl graduates of
Minnesota's normal schools, daughters of Veterans, turbaned with
haloes and aproned with the flag, are unfolding the mysteries of
orthography, chirography, cube roots, and syllogisms, to rejoicing
grandchildren of authentic Patagonian cannibals. Whether as a Daniel
come to judgment or a Jonah come to grief, the "Gallant Veteran"
adorned his era--an era that is past.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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