The Arrow of Gold: A Story Between Two NotesConrad, Joseph
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The Arrow of Gold: A Story Between Two Notes
Conrad, Joseph
Adventure stories; Illegal arms transfers -- Fiction; Marseille (France) -- Fiction; Sea stories; Young men -- Fiction
It was a dreamlike state combined with a dreamlike sense of insecurity.
Then in that warm and scented infinity, or eternity, in which I rested
lost in bliss but ready for any catastrophe, I heard the distant, hardly
audible, and fit to strike terror into the heart, ringing of a bell. At
this sound the greatness of spaces departed. I felt the world close
about me; the world of darkened walls, of very deep grey dusk against the
panes, and I asked in a pained voice:
“Why did you ring, Rita?”
There was a bell rope within reach of her hand. I had not felt her move,
but she said very low:
“I rang for the lights.”
“You didn’t want the lights.”
“It was time,” she whispered secretly.
Somewhere within the house a door slammed. I got away from her feeling
small and weak as if the best part of me had been torn away and
irretrievably lost. Rose must have been somewhere near the door.
“It’s abominable,” I murmured to the still, idol-like shadow on the
couch.
The answer was a hurried, nervous whisper: “I tell you it was time. I
rang because I had no strength to push you away.”
I suffered a moment of giddiness before the door opened, light streamed
in, and Rose entered, preceding a man in a green baize apron whom I had
never seen, carrying on an enormous tray three Argand lamps fitted into
vases of Pompeiian form. Rose distributed them over the room. In the
flood of soft light the winged youths and the butterfly women reappeared
on the panels, affected, gorgeous, callously unconscious of anything
having happened during their absence. Rose attended to the lamp on the
nearest mantelpiece, then turned about and asked in a confident
undertone.
“_Monsieur dîne_?”
I had lost myself with my elbows on my knees and my head in my hands, but
I heard the words distinctly. I heard also the silence which ensued. I
sat up and took the responsibility of the answer on myself.
“Impossible. I am going to sea this evening.”
This was perfectly true only I had totally forgotten it till then. For
the last two days my being was no longer composed of memories but
exclusively of sensations of the most absorbing, disturbing, exhausting
nature. I was like a man who has been buffeted by the sea or by a mob
till he loses all hold on the world in the misery of his helplessness.
But now I was recovering. And naturally the first thing I remembered was
the fact that I was going to sea.
“You have heard, Rose,” Doña Rita said at last with some impatience.
The girl waited a moment longer before she said:
“Oh, yes! There is a man waiting for Monsieur in the hall. A seaman.”
It could be no one but Dominic. It dawned upon me that since the evening
of our return I had not been near him or the ship, which was completely
unusual, unheard of, and well calculated to startle Dominic.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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