“In casting about for a cause for this violent and shocking death,
circumstances point to the effect upon his mind of the bridge
accident at this place. We find that he laid it deeply to heart,
and when he first beheld the scene, he wept over it in an
outburst of grief. That effect he seems not to have been able to
shake off. It followed him night and day, leaving no taste for
food, and driving sleep from his pillow, until he was led to say to
some of his more intimate friends, that he believed it would drive
him crazy. His was a gentle, sensitive nature, and his profession
carried to its utmost perfection and success, which was shown in
the superior condition of the road, and all its appointments were
his chief pride. This pride, we apprehend, never extended to this
bridge, as his rather guarded observations in reference to it,
from the beginning, sufficiently indicate. In the minds of many
of the best informed in this community, he rather shrank from the
responsibility of it. The special care of it, therefore, seems to
have been in a great measure, at least, committed to other hands.
Whatever his feelings, however, he could not in his position escape
responsibility. The sense of that responsibility seems to have
had a striking effect upon him in the recent examinations by the
Legislative Committee, and conferences in which he was present on
Wednesday afternoon and evening--the night, probably, upon which
the fatal act was committed. His state of mind was not unobserved
by some of his intimate companions. We are told that Mr. Brewer,
his trusted assistant, had, at his earnest solicitation, consented
to remain with him during Monday and Tuesday nights, and was
surprised at the alarming state into which his mind had fallen.
“It was further shown by the act, and the manner of it. He had
tendered his resignation to the Board of Directors, on the Monday
before, when with tears he said, ‘I have worked for thirty years,
with what fidelity God knows, for the protection and safety of the
public, and now the public, forgetting all these years of service,
has turned against me.’
“The resignation was, of course, not accepted, and he was assured
that his view was entirely unjust and unworthy, but all to no
effect. The thought of possible injustice still haunted him.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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