The Atlantic Monthly, Volume 12, No. 69, July, 1863: A Magazine of Literature, Art, and PoliticsVarious
General
The Atlantic Monthly, Volume 12, No. 69, July, 1863: A Magazine of Literature, Art, and Politics
Various
American periodicals
"I say that there are slaveries in society, and false marriages are the
worst; and until you and all women are free from them, you never can
become what God meant you to be. Do I speak truth?"
"It is true."
"You will come with me, then?"--his face growing red.
For one moment her head rested against the rock, languid and nerveless.
Then she stood erect.
"I will not go, Paul."
He caught her arm; but she shook him off, and held her hand to her side to
keep down an actual physical pain that some women suffer when their hearts
are tried. Her eyes, it may be, were wakened into a new resolve. It was
useless for him now to appeal to feeling or passion: he had left the
decision to her reason,--to her faith. They were stronger than he.
"I will not go, Paul."
No answer.
"I have no words like you,"--raising her hands to her head,--"but I feel
you are wrong in what you say."
She tried to collect herself, then went on.
"It is true that women sell themselves. I did it,--to escape. I was taught
wrong, as girls are. It's true, Paul, that women are cramped and unhappy
through false marriages, and that there are cursed laws in society that
defraud the poor and the slave."
She stopped, pale and frightened, struggling to find utterance, not being
used to put her thought into words. He watched her keenly.
"But it is _not_ true, Paul,"--with choked eagerness,--"that this life was
given to us only to develop our souls, to be free and happy. That will
come after,--in heaven. It is given here only to those who pray for it.
There's something better here."
"What?"
"To submit. It seems to me there are some great laws--for the good of all.
When we break them, we must submit. Let them go over us, and try to help
others,--what is that text?" holding her head a minute,--"'even as the Son
of Man came not to be ministered unto, but to minister.'"
"You mean to submit?"
"I do. I married that man of my own free will: driven, maybe, by mean
fears,--but--I did it. I will not forswear myself."
She gained courage as she went on.
"I believe that God Himself, and that our Lord, taught the meaning of a
true marriage as you do,--that without that affinity it is none. The curse
comes to every woman who disregards it. It has come to me. I'll bear it."
"Throw it off. Come out of the foul lie."
"I will live no lie, Paul. I never would have gone with John Gurney as his
wife, if he had claimed me."
"Then you are free to be mine,"--coming a step nearer.
She drew back.
"I don't think He taught that. I cannot go behind His words."
"Grey, I will not drag you one step where your free will does not lead
you. Last night I said, 'I love this woman so well that I will leave her
sooner than drag her into crime.' You shall do what you think right. I
will be silent."
"Good bye, then, Paul."
Yet he did not take the offered hand: stood moodily looking down into the
water, crushing back something in his heart,--the only thing in his life
dear or pleasant, it may be.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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