The Atlantic Monthly, Volume 16, No. 94, August, 1865: A Magazine of Literature, Art, and PoliticsVarious
General
The Atlantic Monthly, Volume 16, No. 94, August, 1865: A Magazine of Literature, Art, and Politics
Various
American periodicals
And what, after all, constitutes the charm and the power of
conversation, and makes it so desirable an attainment? Not, certainly,
the amount of knowledge one can bring into play; for, as I have already
shown you, instruction is a secondary object of conversation; and it is
well known also that some of the most learned and best-informed men have
been very poor talkers. Indeed, the scholastic habits which learning
usually engenders are almost a disqualification for fluent and eloquent
speech. The student is one of the last persons who are expected to shine
at a social reunion. But neither can you rely upon brilliant talents, or
original genius, or even upon wit and humor, to make the most charming
converser. The qualities more immediately in requisition for this end
are moral and social. Truth, courage, deference, good-nature,
cheerfulness, sympathy, courtesy, tact, charity,--these are ingredients
of the best conversation, which it would seem that no one need despair
of attaining, and without which, in large measure, the most brilliant
wit, the liveliest imagination, must soon repel rather than attract. And
observe also, in connection with this, that it is not so much the words
a man utters as the tones of his voice which express these moral and
social qualities. Harsh, rude, blunt, severe tones will spoil the
greatest flow of ideas or the utmost elegance of language. But when we
are listening to the low, sweet music in which a genial and joyous and
tender soul will utter itself, what care we for the wit or genius which
are so much envied elsewhere? We did not miss it here. We may have
brought away with us from such company no great fund of new ideas, but
you may be sure something deeper than thought has been awakened,--the
well-spring of purest and tenderest sensibilities has been made to
overflow, and our life will be the greener for it hereafter. Perhaps, if
you think of this a little more, my friend, you will not find it in your
heart to condemn so unsparingly the more ordinary staple of
conversation. Some cynical or unsocial character, deeming himself
superior to the vulgar vacuity and insipidity, will take no part in the
every-day talk which deals so largely in commonplace and truisms.
"Absurd waste of time and breath!" he exclaims. "Of what use this
incessant harping on the weather, or the renewed inquiries after one's
health, or the utterly pointless, if not insincere, exchange of daily
civilities? Who is the wiser for it? What possible good can it do
anybody?" Let us look a little at this, Mr. Cynic. You think it a waste
of breath to greet a friend with a "good morning," or to give your
testimony to the beauty of the day? Of course you are right, if one
should never open his mouth but to impart a new idea, or to announce
some startling fact. But what would you substitute for the morning
salutation? Nothing! And would you really have two friends or brothers
meet on the threshold of a new day, and interchange--blank silence? I
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