The Awakening: (The Resurrection)Tolstoy, Leo, graf
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The Awakening: (The Resurrection)
Tolstoy, Leo, graf
Forgiveness -- Fiction; Russia -- Social life and customs -- Fiction
And it was this man who, falling in love with Katiousha, had a
decisive influence over her. With the instincts of a woman, Maslova
soon discovered it, and the consciousness that she could arouse the
feeling of love in such a remarkable man raised her in her own
estimation. Nekhludoff offered to marry her out of magnanimity, and
the obligation for the past, but Simonson loved her as she was now,
and loved her simply because he loved her. She felt, besides, that he
considered her an unusual woman, distinguished from all other women,
and possessing high moral qualities. She did not know exactly what
those qualities were, but, at all events, not to deceive him, she
endeavored with all her power to call forth her best qualities and,
necessarily, be as good as she could be.
CHAPTER IV.
Nekhludoff managed to see Maslova only twice between Nijhni and
Perm--once in Nijhni while the prisoners were being placed on a
net-covered lighter, and again in the office of the Perm prison. On
both occasions he found her secretive and unkind. When he asked her
about her prison conditions, or whether she wanted anything, she
became confused and answered evasively and, as it seemed to him, with
that hostile feeling of reproach which she had manifested before. And
this gloomy temper, due only to the persecutions to which she was
being subjected by the men, tormented him.
But at their very first meeting in Tomsk she became again as she was
before her departure. She no longer frowned or became confused when
she saw him, but, on the contrary, met him cheerfully and simply,
thanking him for what he had done for her, especially for bringing her
in contact with her present company.
After two months of journey from prison to prison, this change also
manifested itself in her appearance. She became thin, sun-burnt and
apparently older; wrinkles appeared on her temples and around her
mouth; she no longer curled her hair on her forehead, but wore a
'kerchief on her head, and neither in her dress, coiffure, nor in her
conduct were there any signs of her former coquetry. And this change
called forth in Nekhludoff a particularly joyous feeling. The feeling
he now experienced toward her was unlike any he had experienced
before. It had nothing in common with his first poetic impulse, nor
with that sentimental love which he felt afterward, nor even with that
consciousness of a duty performed, coupled with self-admiration, which
impelled him, after the trial, to resolve on marrying her. It was that
same simple feeling of pity and contrition which he experienced at
their first meeting in the prison and afterward, with greater force,
when he conquered his disgust and forgave her conduct with the
physician's assistant in the hospital (the injustice he had done her
had subsequently become plain). It was the same feeling with the
difference that, while it was temporary then, now it was permanent.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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