Paris (France) -- Fiction; País Vasco (Spain) -- Fiction
She uttered the concluding word with an intensity of scorn that lashed
him. She turned to go, but, as on the occasion of their first meeting,
he stepped forward and barred the way.
"You have no right to put that construction on what I say. Our points
of view are different."
"Yes--thank the Holy Saints they _are_ different!"
"I shall try to understand yours; I beg you to try to understand
mine."
Their eyes met again. In his it was impossible for her not to read the
truth. Slowly she lowered hers.
"In my country," she said, more softly now, but still proudly, "love
is another sort of thing. In my country I should have said: 'If you
respect me, sir, you perhaps love me; if you do not respect me, it is
out of the question that you should love me.'"
"Respect you?" This was a challenge to his love that he could not
leave unanswered. His voice rose fresh and clear. He was no longer
under the necessity of seeking words: they leaped, living, to his
lips. "Respect you? Good God, I've been worshiping the very thought of
you from the first glimpse of you I ever had. This miserable room has
been a holy place to me because you have twice been in it. It's been a
holy place, because, from the moment I first found you here, it has
been a place where I dreamed of you. Night and day I've dreamed of
you; and yet have I ever once knowingly done you any harm, trespassed
or presumed on your kindness? I've seen no pure morning without
thinking of you, no beautiful sunset without remembering you; you've
been the harmony of every bar of music, of every bird-song, that I've
heard. When you were gone, the world was empty for me; when I was with
you, all the rest of the world was nothing, and less than nothing.
Respect you? Why, I should have cut off my right hand before I let you
even guess what you've discovered to-day!"
As he spoke, her whole attitude altered. Her hands were still clenched
at her sides, but clenched now in another emotion.
"Is--is this true?" she asked. Her voice was very low.
"It is true," he answered.
"And yet"--she seemed to be not so much addressing him as trying to
quiet an accuser in her own heart--"I never spoke one word that could
give you any hope."
"Not one," he gravely assented. "I never asked for hope; I don't
expect it now."
"And it is--it is really true?" she murmured.
Again he spoke in answer to what she seemed rather to address to her
own heart:
"Because you found out what I'd done, I wanted you to know why I'd
done it--and no more. If you hadn't found out about Chitta, I would
never have told you--this."
She tried to smile, but something caught the smile and broke it. With
a sudden movement, she raised her white hands to her burning face.
"Oh," she whispered, "why did you tell me? Why?"
"Because you accused me, because----" He could not stand there and see
her suffer. "I've been a brute," he said; "I've been a bungling
brute."
"No, no!" She refused to hear him.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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