"I--I would do anything to serve you." Then he went away. Perverse! I _will_ marry him. Other women take husbands so. I like him; I should like him even if he were not an Earl--and his name a career. I shall make Strathay as fine a Countess as any cold, blonde English girl, and he'll be proud of me, and every man will envy him. I shall wrong him less than I should have wronged John Burke. I should have hated John if I had married him, for he'd expect love, where Strathay will be content to give it. Why, the one honest thing I've done was to break with John. I wish I could afford to keep on being honest! CHAPTER V. THE LOVE OF LORD STRATHAY. May 5. Lord deliver me from the well-meaning! Because of one pestilential dun, I've done what the weary waiting for money, money, money would never have driven me to do. I've been to Uncle, unknown to his wife, to ask advice. I might have known better. It was with a wildly beating pulse that I entered the familiar little private office, thinking that Ned might be on the other side of the partition--near enough, perhaps, to hear me; that he might at any moment rap upon the door and enter the room as he used to do, upon such flimsy errands! I wondered how he would look, and what he'd say if he came; but he never did come, though the talk was long enough, mercy knows; long and profitless. It was hard, with that cold sinking at my heart, to talk to the Judge, as he sat with his keen eyes fixed upon me, leaning back in his chair, at times frowning absent-mindedly. "I've come to tell you--I've written home for money," I began breathlessly to explain. "But they don't understand, of course--it isn't half what I need, now. I really don't quite know what to do. And so I came to--" My words died away into unintelligibility. "Anticipated your allowance a little? Well, well, how much do you need?" he asked indulgently. "I don't exactly know; not much," I cried eagerly, "I haven't asked Father to send it all at once. Two or three thousand dollars would be a great help--for the present." "Two or three thousand! Is it little Nelly Winship who is talking about thousands? And what important scheme has she in mind?" His tone was playful. "To pay my bills.'" "Bills aggregating thousands?" He dropped his paper cutter sharply. "Is it possible that in so short a time--if the recital be not too painful, pray explain." "Oh, it's simple enough; the dressmaker would say: 'Do let me make you this, it's such a pleasure to fit you;' or, 'That would be the rage, if you'd introduce it.' And Mrs. Van Dam begged me to buy a hat from a protegee just starting in business, because it would be a help to have the beautiful Miss Winship for a customer. It did help the milliner, too, for I bought three and they were printed in the papers. But she wants her pay just as if it hadn't been worth the price twice over as an advertisement. And all the things for the flat--" "Furniture?"