Sweet girls of Pindus, hither bring Your drums and bag-pipes hollow, THE MAYOR OF DONCASTER I sing,[192] Assist me O Apollo! His worship is a jolly squire, And loyal as a spaniel dog, His zeal as hot as kitchen fire, His head as learned and as big As that great philosophic log Whereon Puff trims his worship's wig. Nature had ta'en Herculean pains To scour his chambers clean from brains, And truly at a vast expence Had cur'd and purg'd them quite from evil sense. Brains, sense, and wit, are such low vulgar things As seldom trouble the heads of mayors or kings. What of the mayor of Doncaster, I pray? Sir he received a letter t'other day; Judge, readers, judge, what huge surprize Stretch'd like a brace of moons his eyes, Judge, how he gaped for joy, for breath, And show'd the ruins of his teeth; Judge, how his head sublimer grew, Judge, how his shoulders widen'd too, Judge, how he swung his arms about, Judge, how he mov'd his legs so stout, So big he look'd you would have swore A giant stood where stood a dwarf before. Reader, behold this wonderful epistle, And if thou canst not laugh, go whistle.-- "King George's compliments to Mr. Mayor, Queen Charlotte also greets his lady fair. Their gracious majesties have heard with pleasure How you have sacrificed both time and treasure On flannel jackets, breeches, stockings, socks, Also on good warm petticoats and smocks, To clothe our gallant troops abroad in Flanders,[193] Their pretty lasses and our smart commanders, The queen and princesses are quite delighted, And king George swears such deeds shall be requited; Come, come to London, sir, come and be knighted."