Nothing is much more annoying than the _intermeddling of friends_ in a case like this. The wife appeals to _them_, and "_good breeding_," that is to say _nonsense_, is sure to put them on _her side_. Then they, particularly the _women_, when describing the _surprising progress_ made by their _own sons_ at school, used, if one of mine were present, to turn to him, and ask to what school _he went_, and what _he_ was _learning_? I leave any one to judge of _his_ opinion of her; and whether _he_ would like her the better for that! "Bless me, so tall, and _not learned_ anything _yet_!" "Oh, yes, he has," I used to say; "he has learned to ride, and hunt, and shoot, and fish, and look after cattle and sheep, and to work in the garden, and to feed his dogs, and to go from village to village in the dark." This was the way I used to manage with troublesome customers of this sort. And how glad the children used to be, when they got clear of such criticising people! And how grateful they felt to me for the _protection_ which they saw that I gave them against that state of restraint, of which other people's boys complained! Go whither they might, they found no place so pleasant as home, and no soul that came near them affording them so many means of gratification as they received from me. THE CAP THAT FITS [Sidenote: _Austin Dobson_] "Qui sème épines n'aille déchaux" _SCENE--A Salon with blue and white panels. Outside, persons pass and repass upon a terrace_. HORTENSE. ARMANDE. MONSIEUR LOYAL HORTENSE _(behind her fan)_ Not young, I think. ARMANDE _(raising her eye-glass)_ And faded, too!-- _Quite_ faded! Monsieur, what say you? M. LOYAL Nay,--I defer to you. In truth, To me she seems all grace and youth. HORTENSE Graceful? You think it? What, with hands That hang like this? _(with a gesture)._ ARMANDE And how she stands! M. LOYAL Nay,--I am wrong again. I thought Her air delightfully untaught! HORTENSE But you amuse me-- M. LOYAL Still her dress,-- Her dress at least, you _must_ confess-- ARMANDE Is odious simply! Jacotot Did not supply that lace, I know; And where, I ask, has mortal seen A hat unfeathered? HORTENSE Edged with green!! M. LOYAL The words remind me. Let me say A Fable that I heard to-day. Have I permission? BOTH _(with enthusiasm)_ Monsieur, pray!