England -- Fiction; Love stories; Scholars -- Fiction
George Bertram had returned to town that Sunday after the conference
in Miss Baker's little room not in the very best of moods. He had
talked glibly enough on his way back, because it had been necessary
for him to hide his chagrin; but he had done so in a cynical tone,
which had given Harcourt to understand that something was wrong. For
some ten days after that there had been no intercourse between him
and Littlebath; and then he had written a letter to Caroline, full
of argument, full also of tenderness, in which he essayed to move
her from her high resolve. He had certainly written strongly, if not
well. "He was working," he said, "nearly as hard as a man could work,
in order to insure success for her. Nothing he was aware but the idea
that he was already justified in looking on her as his wife would
have induced him to labour so strictly; and for this he was grateful
to her. She had given him this great and necessary incitement; and
he therefore thanked God that he had on his shoulders the burden,
as well as in his heart the blessing, of such an engagement. But
the strain would be too great for him if the burden were to remain
present to him daily, while the blessing was to be postponed for so
long a time. He had already felt his spirits numbed and his energy
weakened. It seemed to him in all his daily work that his great hope
had been robbed from him. His dreams told him that he was to be
happy, but his waking moments brought him back to disappointment.
He knew that he could not endure it, that he could not remain there
at his post, diligent as he fain would be, if his reward were to be
postponed for so long. As being under a holy engagement to you,"
he wrote, perhaps almost too solemnly, "I have given up that sort
of life to which my natural disposition might have led me. Do not
suppose that I say this with regret. I rejoice to have done so,
rejoice to be so doing; but it is for you that I do it. Should I not
look to you for my reward? Granting that there may be risk, shall not
I share it? Supposing that there may be suffering, shall not I endure
it? And if a man with his best efforts may protect a woman from
suffering, I will protect you." So he had written, and had ended by
imploring her to let them be married that autumn.
By return of post he got three lines from her, calling him her
dearest, dearest George, and requesting that he would allow her a
week to answer his letter at length. It could not be answered without
deep thought. This gratified him much, and he wrote another note to
her, begging her on no account to hurry herself; that he would wait
for her reply with the utmost patience; but again imploring her to be
merciful. It was, however, apparent in the tone of his note, apparent
at least to Caroline, that he judged the eloquence of his letter to
be unanswerable, and that he was already counting on her surrender.
This lessened the effect of it on Caroline's heart;--for when first
received it had had a strong effect.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account