England -- Fiction; Love stories; Scholars -- Fiction
Certainly, no indifferent listener would have said that there was any
tone of anger in Bertram's voice; and yet there was that in it which
made Miss Waddington feel that the room was swimming round and round
her. She turned ruby red up to her hair. Bertram had never before
seen her blush like that; for he had never before seen her covered by
shame. Oh! how she had repented showing that letter! How her soul had
grieved over it from the very moment that it had passed out of her
hand! She had done so in the hotness of her passion. He had written
to her sharp stinging words which had maddened her. Up to that moment
she had never known how sharp, how stinging, how bitter words might
be. The world had hitherto been so soft to her! She was there told
that she was unfeminine, unladylike! And then, he that was sitting by
her was so smooth, so sympathizing, so anxious to please her! In her
anger and her sympathy she had shown it; and from that day to this
she had repented in the roughness of sackcloth and the bitterness of
ashes. It was possible that Caroline Waddington should so sin against
a woman's sense of propriety; that, alas! had been proved; but it was
impossible that she should so sin and not know that she had sinned,
not feel the shame of it.
She did stand before him red with shame; but at the first moment she
made no answer. It was in her heart to kneel at his feet, to kneel in
the spirit if not in the body, and ask his pardon; but hitherto she
had asked pardon of no human being. There was an effort in the doing
of it which she could not at once get over. Had his eyes looked
tenderly on her for a moment, had one soft tone fallen from his lips,
she would have done it. Down she would have gone and implored his
pardon. And who that he had once loved had ever asked aught in vain
from George Bertram? Ah, that she had done so! How well they might
have loved each other! What joy there might have been!
But there was nothing tender in his eye, no tender tone softened the
words which fell from his mouth.
"What!" he said, and in spite of his promise, his voice had never
before sounded so stern,--"what! show that letter to another man;
show that letter to Mr. Harcourt! Is that true, Caroline?"
A child asks pardon from his mother because he is scolded. He wishes
to avert her wrath in order that he may escape punishment. So also
may a servant of his master, or an inferior of his superior. But when
one equal asks pardon of another, it is because he acknowledges and
regrets the injury he has done. Such acknowledgment, such regret
will seldom be produced by a stern face and a harsh voice. Caroline,
as she looked at him and listened to him, did not go down on her
knees--not even mentally. Instead of doing so, she remembered her
dignity, and wretched as she was at heart, she continued to seat
herself without betraying her misery.
"Is that true, Caroline? I will believe the charge against you from
no other lips than your own."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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