The Best of the World's Classics, Restricted to prose. Volume III (of X) - Great Britain and Ireland I
General
The Best of the World's Classics, Restricted to prose. Volume III (of X) - Great Britain and Ireland I
Literature -- Collections
My master, pursuant to the advice of his friend, carried me in a box
the next market-day to the neighboring town, and took along with him
his little daughter, my nurse, upon a pillion behind him. The box was
close on every side, with a little door for me to go in and out, and a
few gimlet-holes to let in air. The girl had been so careful as to put
the quilt of her baby's bed into it for me to lie down on. However, I
was terribly shaken and discomposed in this journey, tho it were but
of half an hour; for the horse went about forty feet at every step,
and trotted so high that the agitation was equal to the rising and
falling of a ship in a great storm, but much more frequent. Our
journey was somewhat farther than from London to St. Alban's. My
master alighted at an inn which he used to frequent; and after
consulting a while with the innkeeper, and making some necessary
preparations, he hired the "grultrud," or crier, to give notice
through the town of a strange creature to be seen at the sign of the
Green Eagle, not so big as a splacnuck (an animal in that country
very finely shaped, about six feet long), and in every part of the
body resembling a human creature--could speak several words, and
perform a hundred diverting tricks.
I was placed upon a table in the largest room of the inn, which might
be near three hundred feet square. My little nurse stood on a low
stool close to the table, to take care of me and direct what I should
do. My master, to avoid a crowd, would suffer only thirty people at a
time to see me. I walked about on the table as the girl commanded; she
asked me questions as far as she knew my understanding of the language
reached, and I answered them as loud as I could. I turned about
several times to the company, paid my humble respects, said "they were
welcome," and used some other speeches I had been taught. I took up a
thimble filled with liquor, which Glumdalclitch had given me for a
cup, and drank their health. I drew out my hanger, and flourished with
it after the manner of fencers in England. My nurse gave me a part of
a straw, which I exercised as a pike, having learned the art in my
youth. I was that day shown to twelve sets of company, and as often
forced to act over again the same fopperies, till I was half dead with
weariness and vexation; for those who had seen me made such wonderful
reports that the people were ready to break down the doors to come in.
My master, for his own interest, would not suffer any one to touch me
except my nurse; and to prevent danger, benches were set round the
table at such a distance as to put me out of everybody's teach.
However, an unlucky schoolboy aimed a hazel-nut directly at my head,
which very narrowly missed me; otherwise it came with so much violence
that it would have infallibly knocked out my brains, for it was almost
as large as a small pumpion: but I had the satisfaction to see the
young rogue well beaten and turned out of the room....
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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