Arab Americans -- Fiction; Immigrants -- New York (State) -- New York -- Fiction
Of that Chapter, In Prison, we have given what might be called the
exogenous bark of the Soul, or that which environment creates. And now
we shall endeavour to show the reader somewhat of the ludigenous
process, by which the Soul, thrumming its own strings or eating its
own guts, develops and increases its numbers. For Khalid in these
gaol-days is much like Hamlet's player, or even like Hamlet
himself--always soliloquising, tearing a passion to rags. And what
mean these outbursts and objurgations of his, you will ask; these
suggestions, fugitive, rhapsodical, mystical; this furibund allegro
about Money, Mediums, and Bohemia; these sobs and tears and
asseverations, in which our Lady of the Studio and Shakib are both
expunged with great billahs;--the force and significance of these
subliminal uprushes, dear Reader, we confess we are, like yourself,
unable to understand, without the aid of our Interpreter. We shall,
therefore, let him speak.
"When in prison," writes Shakib, "Khalid was subject to spasms and
strange hallucinations. One day, when I was sweating in the effort to
get him out of gaol, he sends me word to come and see him. I go; and
after waiting a while at the Iron gate, I behold Khalid rushing down
the isle like an angry lion. 'What do you want,' he growled, 'why are
you here?' And I, amazed, 'Did you not send for me?' And he snapped
up, 'I did; but you should not have come. You should withhold from me
your favours.' Life of Allah, I was stunned. I feared lest his mind,
too, had gone in the direction of his health, which was already
sorrily undermined. I looked at him with dim, tearful eyes, and
assured him that soon he shall be free. 'And what is the use of
freedom,' he exclaimed, 'when it drags us to lower and darker depths?
Don't think I am miserable in prison. No; I am not--I am happy. I have
had strange visions, marvellous. O my Brother, if you could behold the
sloughs, deeper and darker than any prison-cell, into which _you_ have
thrown me. Yes, _you_--and another. O, I hate you both. I hate my
best lovers. I hate You--no--no, no, no.' And he falls on me, embraces
me, and bathes my cheeks with his tears. After which he falters out
beseechingly, 'Promise, promise that you will not give me any more
money, and though starving and in rags you find me crouching at your
door, promise.' And of a truth, I acquiesced in all he said, seeing
how shaken in body and mind he was. But not until I had made a promise
under oath would he be tranquillised. And so, after our farewell
embrace, he asked me to come again the following day and bring him
some books to read. This I did, fetching with me Rousseau's _Emile_
and Carlyle's _Hero-Worship_, the only two books he had in the cellar.
And when he saw them, he exclaimed with joy, 'The very books I want! I
read them twice already, and I shall read them again. O, let me kiss
you for the thought.' And in an ecstasy he overwhelms me again with
suffusing sobs and embraces.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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