The Brass Bottle: A Farcical Fantastic Play in Four ActsAnstey, F.
Science
The Brass Bottle: A Farcical Fantastic Play in Four Acts
Anstey, F.
Fantasy drama; Jinn -- Drama
[_She goes into study, closing the
sliding-doors after her. A slight
pause. SYLVIA pushes the sofa
back against the sliding-doors and
seats herself on it._
PRINGLE.
[_Approaching the sofa, with sympathy._] I really had no idea your father
was--was as bad as all _this_.
SYLVIA.
[_On her guard._] People _do_ kick, Mr. Pringle, when they have gout--in
both legs.
PRINGLE.
_Do_ they? I should hardly have thought--particularly--[_with meaning_]--if
they've gout in--all four.
SYLVIA.
[_Shrinking back._] "All four!" Then--you _know_!
PRINGLE.
Pardon me--but I couldn't help catching a glimpse just now--through these
doors.
SYLVIA.
A glimpse? What did you--_suppose_ you saw?
PRINGLE.
I had an impression--of course I may be quite wrong!--that any one who
didn't _know_ your father might almost mistake him, at first sight, for--I
am trying to put it as delicately as I can--for some kind
of--er--_quadruped_.
[_He sits on sofa beside her._
SYLVIA.
You mean a _mule_! [_She rises in tears, and crosses to the mantelpiece._]
I think I could have borne it better if he'd only been a _nice_ mule.
B--but--[_breaking down_]--he _isn't_!
PRINGLE.
[_Rising and going towards her._] You don't say so! [_Sympathetically._]
That, of course, must make it all the harder for you.
SYLVIA.
[_Tearfully._] His temper is simply _fearful_! Why, just now, when I said
he must try to manage some oats or a carrot for lunch, he--he lashed out
and sent his hoofs through the mummy-case!
PRINGLE.
Dear--dear! Perhaps if you could persuade him to see a vet----[_Correcting
himself._] I mean a _doctor_----
SYLVIA.
[_Crossing towards sofa on right._] It would be no use--he never _will_
take medicine! And what are we to _do_ with him? It's too dreadful to think
that he may have to be sent to--to a Home of Rest for Horses!
[_She sinks on sofa, and bursts
into tears once more._
PRINGLE.
[_Following her._] He never _was_ what you might call a "horsey" man--let
us hope he won't come to _that_! Have you any idea how he came to
be--er--affected like this?
SYLVIA.
[_Resentfully, through her tears._] There's no _affectation_ about it, Mr.
Pringle--oh, you mean "afflicted"--we can't _think_. He wasn't as bright as
usual at breakfast--I think he was rather worried because he couldn't find
that seal Horace lent him last night----
PRINGLE.
But no amount of _worry_----! Pardon me, I interrupt you.
[_He takes a chair by the sofa._
SYLVIA.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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